The Missing Pieces
by annieDD
Summary: A friend. A trusted adviser. A sister. When you owe your life to someone, there is very little you wouldn't do for them. Milani owes her life to Daenerys Targaryen, a woman she loves and considers her only family. What happens when Dany starts making decisions that affect Milani as well? What if Milani's hand in marriage is worth more than she thought? AU/OC, rated M, Season 6...
1. Chapter 1

**Okay, so the last thing you need when you're writing six stories is to START ANOTHER STORY!  
What do I do? Yup, I start a new story. **

**Fair warning: I will not update once a week. It is impossible for me to do that. However, I will try to update as much as I can.  
I won't give you more details, since you do have a bit of a prologue.  
I do not own anything in the GOT universe.  
English ain't my first languge, so I'm sorry for any mistakes I might make.  
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A servant. A friend. A trusted adviser. A sister.

Milani is her name. If she has a last name, she never speaks of it.

Milani and Daenerys met many years ago, when both were still children. Milani was Dany's opposite in so many ways. Purple eyed and silver haired, Dany was more noticeable than the brown haired, dark eyed Milani. Both were tall, slender and beautiful in their own, different ways. Milani was a quiet girl, always standing two steps behind her friend. She would have done the same even if her friend was not a Queen. Khalessi, rightful heir of Westeros and a Queen.

Milani is from Volantis. She never speaks of her family, never of her home. Only about her city, which she claims not to remember all too well, since she left it when she was barely four years old.

How she ended up in Pentos, she either did not know or did not speak of. Illyrio Mopatis was the man who introduced her to Dany. At first, the two barely spoke to one another. Dany only ever had a friend in her older brother, Viserys. And Milani did not speak much to anyone. For many years, Illyrio Mopatis did not even know Milani spoke the common tongue. How she learned it, she never said. Those who knew her and Dany always suspected it was Dany who taught her, and that Milani, in return, taught her Valyrian.

When she was still a girl herself, Milani started working as the girl's handmaiden. Having her friend be her servant never bothered Dany, as she had treated her all the same. Milani might have been the one to bring her food in the morning, but by the end of the day, the two would sit on the floor, talking about whatever interesting events they might have experienced during the day.

The girls grow even closer to one another over the years and when Dany was set to marry Khal Drogo, she wanted Milani with her. Milani, of course, agreed. She would have followed her friend wherever her friend might go.

That is how Milani's story started, many moons ago. And no one, not even Milani herself, could ever guess how it might end.

…

I do not like the Great Pyramid. It is not something I can explain; I simply did not like it. It felt empty before and it is even emptier now, with Dany gone.

Villas, houses, cold basements, war camps. All of that and somehow, this place is the one with the lingering, eerie feeling.

I suppose it is the silence that bothers me. In villas and houses, even in cold basements, I was not alone, not ever. You could hear people talking in different languages, you could hear jokes and laughter and children, as they played around you. Children that even made basements feel less cold and frightening. And war camps? There, you were never alone. People, children, horses and not a moment of silence.

Here? The halls echoed with every sound my sandals made as I walked through them.

I did not notice it at first, but with Dany gone, it has become worse.

"My Lord," I announce as I walk into the room. "Missandei tells me you wish to see me."

"Yes, Lady Milani," he tells me. "Please come inside."

"My Lord, I appreciate your kindness, but I am no lady. Call me Milani, please."

"Everyone else seems to call you My Lady."

"Everyone else does not listen," I tell him. "I have no name, no title, no house. I am no lady."

"Yet they tell me that you are Daenerys Targaryen's most trusted advisor."

"People speak, whether they are well informed or not."

I watch as Tyrion Lannister walks over to a small table and pours wine in two glasses; he walks over to me, handing me a glass. I take it, still watching him.

I've heard of the name even before I've seen him. The Imp. Tyrion Lannister, the youngest child of Tywin Lannister, the former Hand of The King to King Aerys Targaryen. Dany's father, also known as the Mad King.

He was small, which was not a surprise. Despite being small, he had a presence. His eyes stared at me in the same way mine stared at him. Both of us are trying to read the other one, and neither one of us is bothering to hide it.

"Why don't you take a seat, Milani?" he suggests. I did not want to do that, no more than I wanted to have this conversation with him, but I doubt I have a real choice. I nod and take a seat.

"What do you wish to speak of, my Lord?" I ask as I follow him with my eyes. He sits opposite me and almost downs his wine in one gulp.

The Westerosi kind. They do not know how to appreciate the finer things in life. One should drink wine slowly, relishing every sip of the bitter liquid. Or perhaps he had far too much wine in his life to truly enjoy it. There was a time when I would be thankful for water. It should not come as a surprise that I appreciate wine more than Tyrion Lannister does.

"What is your opinion on me, Milani?" he asks me. For a moment, I think he is joking, laughing at me. as his eyes do not look away from me, I realize that he is not.

"I am yet to decide, my Lord," I answer truthfully. "Why would you ask such a question?"

"I wanted to hear your opinion," he tells me, and by his speak of speaking, I can tell he is choosing his words very carefully. "Especially since Queen Daenerys seems to value your opinion." he adds. Now it makes more sense. He wishes to know what I have been whispering in her ear beforehand.

"Queen Daenerys is also highly capable of forming her own opinion, my Lord."

"There is no doubt in my mind that she is. However, I have been informed that you are her most trusted adviser. Closer than Missandei, closer than Grey Worm. Even closer than Daario Naharis."

"I doubt that," I tell him, taking a small sip of my wine. "There is, however, a difference in being someone's friend and someone's adviser, my Lord. The two do not always go hand in hand."

"But they do, when it comes to you and the Queen. Or am I mistaken?" he asks me. If I wanted to pretend and hide the actual depth of my connection to Dany, it was too late for that now. I was warned that Tyrion Lannister is a smart man. I did not expect him to fulfill those expectations.

"I met Daenerys Targaryen when I was still a child," I tell him, looking away from him as I speak; I look at the sunset, visible from the opening in the wall right behind where Tyrion Lannister was sitting. That is the only good thing about the Great Pyramid. It offers one hell of a view. "She was a friend to me when no one else would be my friend. She saved my life in more ways than she will ever know. Some bonds are stronger than blood, my Lord. It may sound foolish, but it is true. I have followed her since I was a child and I will follow her lead until my dying day."

"You were there when she needed you?" he asks me.

"I suppose so. She could always trust me. When you are a Queen with no crown, there are not many people you can trust. Dany learned her lesson. I have seen the pain she was in and I can assure you, I do not have an intention to see her feel that pain again."

"Are you giving me a promise or a warning?" he asks, cracking a smile at me.

"Both," I answer, keeping a straight face. "I would rather cut my own arm off than betray her. And I will do all that is in my power to keep others from betraying her. As much as I can do, that is. Daario Naharis is the one wielding a sword. I wield a different kind of weapon."

"You are making it very difficult for me to trust you, Milani," he admits, shaking his head at me. "You are either the finest liar I have ever encountered, or completely honest."

"I could say the same for you, my Lord," I sigh. "You do not need my trust and I do not need yours. You know that Dany trusts me and that should be enough for you. The same way as her trust in you is enough for me. For the time being." I add. While it is enough for now, I need him to know that that trust is not limitless. If I see him playing games on her expense, I will not hold back.

"Do you think she will return?" he asks me.

"I know it," I tell him. "Ser Jorah Mormont betrayed her and broke her trust in the worst possible way, but the man loves her. As does Daario Naharis. Both of them would rather die than to let anything happen to her. They will find her."

"I am afraid they will die before they have a chance to do so."

"Lord Tyrion, if you are going to follow her and be her advisor, I would advise you to have more faith in her. She will be back." I say, without a shadow of doubt in my mind.

"It is not her I doubt," he laughs. "It is Jorah Mormont and Daario Naharis."

"Do not," I shake my head at him. "If anyone can get her back, it is the two of them. That is, unless, she finds a way herself. Which would not come as a surprise to me. Do not waste your worry on her, Lord Tyrion. We should worry about Meereen. After all, we are the ones ruling it in her stead now."

"You, me, Missandei and Grey Worm," he nods, staring down in his now empty glass. "What are the chances that we will lose Meereen by the time she returns?"

"Slim to none, my Lord."

…

" _What is on your mind?" I ask; she looks worried. Of course, she often looks worried._

" _Some things are troubling me, but it is nothing I cannot handle."_

" _I am here if you wish to talk," I smile. I do not want to push her, but she needs to know that if she needs me, I will be ready to help. "Day or night, I am here." I remind her as I take a grape from my plate and throw it into my mouth. I stay silent for a moment, as I can see her pondering whether or not to share her worries with me. As much as I would like to help, I know that some things are better left alone._

" _So many things have happened since Drogo died," she sighs. "So much time has passed."_

" _And we have not even noticed it," I agree. "Time flies. It always does. But we have not been standing still. You have freed cities and gained followers. All the while, all of them in Westeros are killing each other before you have a chance to end them."_

" _I agree, they have been doing a darn good job," she smiles and I laugh. Even better for us. "Do you ever feel lonely, Milani?" she asks me._

" _Not really, no," I answer, but as soon as I do, I stop and think about my statement. "Perhaps at times. It is difficult to feel lonely when you are always with friends."_

" _I did not mean it like that," Dany smiles at me. "I wonder if you ever… desire company of a man?" she asks me. I could tell it was not an easy question for her to ask; just as I could tell that she felt a bit more uncomfortable when I started laughing._

" _Dany, you know I have never been with a man," I tell her, smiling at her. "How can I miss something I did not have? If you are asking me this because you want the company of a man… well, that is understandable. You were a woman married. You know what you are missing. It is normal."_

" _Is it?" she asks. "You never felt any desire for a man?"_

" _I did," I admit, trying to remember. "I liked a man and I would go red in the face whenever he would look at me, but that is how it ended. If I had truly felt it, I'm not sure what I would do."_

" _You would go through with it," Dany tells me and I look at her in surprise. "You are brave. You do not care what people say. I know you, Milani. If you wanted someone, if you truly wanted someone, nothing else would matter to you."_

" _Perhaps you are right," I shrug. "After all, you do know me better than I know myself. And that would explain my chastity, if I never truly wanted anyone. But that is only me. If you want someone, it is alright to be brave."_

" _Is it?"_

" _Of course it is, Danny," I laugh. "You are a Queen. You are Daenerys Targaryen, Daenerys Stormborn, the Breaker of Chains. If you want a lover, bloody well take one!"_

" _Do you truly find that to be acceptable?" she asks me._

" _Dany, you know the stories as well as I do, if not better," I smile at her, shaking my head. "If men can have loves that give them bastards, if men can visit pleasure houses without anyone batting an eye, why should a woman be concerned about taking a lover? A Queen, at that."_

" _You see the world in a simpler way than it actually is."_

" _Perhaps," I shrug. "But I do know we do not get a second chance at living. With everything that you have done, with all the lives you've saved, would it harm anyone if you were to have a little bit of fun?"_

" _You might be right."_

" _Is it Ser Jorah?" I ask and her eyes go wide._

" _Milani!" she snaps in surprise. "No! Never! Ser Jorah is…. He is like a father to me."_

" _Perhaps he may be a father to you, but I can assure you, you are not like a daughter to him." I tell her. I am unsure if she could not realize it, or if she turned her head in a different direction on purpose, not wanting to see the truth. I did look the right way and I saw the way Ser Jorah looked at her._

 _It might not be my place, but I know that he would treat her right. The man would take an arrow for her, without batting an eye. Is that not what every little girl dreams of, when she imagines her Prince?_

 _But she is not looking for a Prince. She does not need a man that would take an arrow for her. She has plenty of men around her that would gladly do it, whether she takes them into her bed or not. She does not need a husband, nor love. She wants a lover. Ser Jorah would never be the right option for that. She would break his heart into a million little pieces if she was to use him like that. No… luckily for her, she has plenty of men around her who would gladly be used in such a way._

" _Ser Jorah is kind and honorable, but…"_

" _He is not what you look for in a lover," I finish in her stead as she nods her head in confirmation. "Well, you have an army to choose from." I laugh._

" _I doubt the Unsullied have what I need."_

" _Not all of your men are Unsullied, are they now?" I ask, raising my eyebrow at her. "I see things, Dany. Perhaps even more than I should and without a doubt, more than I'd like. Daario Naharis worships the ground you walk on. And I think you know it as well."_

" _I need Daario Naharis to keep me safe and fight my battles."_

" _He can do both, so long as you do not tire him out," I laugh. My laugh grows louder when I see her go all red in the face. "Do not hold yourself back, Dany. You and I both know what you have been through. The perils you had to go through, the husband you loved and lost… It is difficult enough as it is. If you want something, especially if it is something as trivial as having a man in your bed on different occasions, you should not hold yourself back. We only get one life, Dany. You do deserve to have a little fun in it." I tell her, knowing that she never really had proper fun._

 _I remember when we were children. She would always follow Viserys, always listening to him speak about the Throne that was his. With a brother and a family legacy such as hers, Dany never got a chance to be a proper child, to play in the puddles and get dirt on her dresses._

 _She loved Drogo and then she lost him. I was there, every step of the way, trying to comfort her even if I could not even imagine the grief she was going through. I have never lost anyone that I care for. Not that I knew, at least. It was all foreign to me, but I saw my friend and pain and I just wanted to help._

 _She deserves a little bit of fun. She deserves a man that will make her forget about the wars she is fighting and the quest she is on. All of it will still be there in the morning. The only problem is that she is responsible and does not want to do that, not without reassurance from someone. In this case, me._

" _It all seems so wrong," she shakes her head. "I do not know if I can do that."_

" _It might seem wrong, but I have a slight suspicion that it will feel right," I smile at her. "And regarding you being unsure if you can do that… You are Daenerys Targaryen. You can absolutely do whatever it is that you want."_

" _What would I do without you, Milani?" she asks me._

" _Be an equally good Queen as you are now," I smile as she rolls her eyes at me. "You give me more credit then I deserve. You have always done that."_

" _And you do not give yourself credit enough," she leans over the table and takes me by the hand. "You are the only one that has been there for me, since we were both children. You have never left my side. You are my closest friend, Milani. You are a sister to me. We might not have the same blood in our veins but you are my family. The only family I have left."_

" _I will always be here for you, sister." I say, squeezing her hand as well. There were a thousand words I wanted to say, but I stay quiet, knowing they would fall short to the words she used._

 _She knows it. She knows I would do anything for her. She knows I would follow her into death, if that is where she is going. I even did that before and lived to tell the tale._

 _I owe her my life. We might not have the same blood, but she is my sister. And she will be my sister until my dying day._


	2. Chapter 2

**Okay, wow.**

 **I am seriously impressed with this start. You guys seem to like what I have come up with and I'm super happy because of that! Vacation time is over for me, so I'll be writing more, but right now, I need to catch up on my work :( If all goes by plan, you will have a new chapter in a couple of days!**

 **Since Dany is not in the same location as Milani is right now, I imagine it was easy for you to spot the flashbacks. Just in case, I'll write it here: flashbacks are in italics. I will probably keep up with them, since there is about 15 years + 5 seasons worth of material to use.**

 **Last, but not least, thank you! I did not expect such a number for one chapter alone. And the reviews, come on guys, you made my heart melt! Keep 'em coming, they really do mean a lot. Those of you who write here as well know what a pat on the back they are.**

 **Let me know what you think about this one. I'm always open to suggestions and advice! Love ya! :)**

* * *

I curse as the ends of my dress tangle between my legs; I was in a rush and I was running low of patience. I hold the ends of my dress up as I rush through the halls, knowing I would end up ripping the dress apart if it bothered me once more. I was in a rush and I was angry. Angry enough to forget my courtesies and slam the door of the Imp's chambers open, causing him to jump up from where he was sitting and look up at me, wide eyed. I slam the door behind me, knowing that this was a conversation I would not want anyone to hear.

"You released them?" I ask Tyrion Lannister, doing my best not to show just how angry I really was. I have learn many, many things from Daenerys, and one of them is not to show my emotions when I am negotiating. This was hardly a negotiation, but it was no regular conversation either.

"Yes, I have." He confirms, looking at his glass and not at me.

"Viserion and Rhaegal were chained for a reason," I tell him. "She was the one who chained them."

"They needed to be free."

"Because when free, they burn innocent children," I tell him, raising my voice. "You do not understand how much she loves them. She would kill for them. They are her children. Chaining them up is probably the hardest thing she has ever done and yet she did it nonetheless. She did for a good reason."

"Well, she is not here, is she?" he asks, still looking at his glass. "You and I are supposed to rule in her stead."

"And yet you are the one doing all the ruling. I cannot seem to recall you asking for my say."

"Is that the problem, Milani?" he asks, finally turning around to look at me. "Is the problem that I set her dragons free or that I did not ask you if you approve of it?"

I wanted to yell at him, perhaps even smack him. As much as I knew that would end badly, I wanted to do it. Holding myself back, I walk towards one of the wooden benches and make myself comfortable.

"We will not do a good job if we do not talk," I say, looking above him, through the window. "And I will start, since you obviously have your doubts. There is one thing you should know first. I do not care about power. I do not need it, I do not want it. I never wanted to rule, I was never trained to do so. The only training I had was watching her do it, and it is evident that it was not enough. I do not want to rule Meereen, or any of the Free Cities. Not even temporarily. I am doing it for her, I am doing it with you because when she returns, and she will, I do not want to see her disappointed. I do not want to lose this place while she is away and that is the only reason why I am showing any kind of interest. I told you this before and I will repeat it as many times as you find necessary. I have no title and I have no name. I have a life and a purpose. A purpose to help my friend. Ruling here is me helping her, not me climbing towards the top of a golden ladder."

"You really do not desire power, do you?" he asks me.

"No," I shake my head at him. "I do not come from much, my lord. I do not want much either. I do not want power. I have seen what power does to people."

When it comes to Dany, that is the only thing I am worried about. I know she could be a good, just ruler, but power changes people. I still remember the madness in Viserys's eyes, only because he wanted power and he thought he lost it. I think I will always remember the look in his eyes.

"Being close to a Queen gives you power." He tells me.

"Not that much power," I shake my head. "I do not have power, I have trust."

"If you are going to follow your Queen everywhere, you must get used to it," he chuckles. He is laughing but I see no humor on his face. "In Westeros, it is all about power. Having power, fighting for power, the desire for power… nothing else matters."

"Tell me more about it, then," I say, earning a confused look from them. "If I am to go there, if I am to be with Dany every step of the way, I must know what I am entering. Or am I wrong?"

"No, you are not," he shakes his head. "What is it that you do not know?"

"Well, I know the Kings," I say, frowning as I try to remember them. "Baratheon. Joffrey was the King before, now it is his brother and your nephew. Torren, is it?" I ask.

"Tommen." He corrects me.

"Tommen," I repeat. "Then, King Stannis. Younger brother of the usurper. Also dead, as far as we know."

"Yes," Tyrion confirms. "The other younger brother was also killed."

"Iron Islands?" I ask.

"Yes, but they are no real danger to anyone," he shakes his head at me. "Tommen and the rest of my family barely have a hold on anything anymore. They only have Casterly Rock, Highgarden and King's Landing." He tells me.

"Only? To me that sounds like a lot of territory, Lord Tyrion."

"Not nearly as much as Robb Stark holds."

"The one with a dead Volantene wife?"

"The very one," Tyrion confirms. "The only one that managed to defeat my father and brother on the battlefield. Given what I have done before arriving to Meereen, I would say Robb Stark owes me a favor or two."

Ah, yes. A man who killed his father.

I wish I was more judgmental. I wish I could use that against him, as an explanation as to why I do not like him or trust him. I can't. Over the years, I have known good, honorable man and I have known the scums that call themselves men. If Tyrion Lannister did what he did, which is not something that would be likely done, I am positive that he must have had a solid reason to do it. Not to mention that I did hear about The Lannister Imp before I even heard his full birth name.

"Do you think that Daenerys has enough men to take him on? Enough men? Enough ships, horses?"

"It is not simply about winning a war."

"What is it about then?"

"What do you think?" he asks. For a moment, I think he is making fun of me. His tone of voice, however, was not condescending. He was asking me a serious question. And the answer was evident.

"Holding that power for good," I say, watching as Tyrion Lannister nods his head. "Holding and keeping that power and being a good ruler."

"Both are equally important," he sighs as he fills his glass once again. "You cannot win a war and then expect the entire land to rule itself. Just as you cannot be a ruler if you do not have a land to rule. Both are equally important. The Queen is smart. She knows it will not be simple. We only have to make sure that it will not be impossible as well."

His motivations are like a riddle to me. With all that I know and I heard, I understand why he is not on the same side as he was before. Truth be told, he never was on that side by choice; he was born on that side. He was fighting his own battles and wars even before he decided to join Daenerys.

"Why her?" I ask, earning a surprised look from him. "Why Daenerys? Why are you on her side, why are you helping her?"

"There are plenty of reasons, Milani," he gives me a small smile, one that does not reach his eyes; he seems too tired to actually smile. I cannot say if he is simply physically tired or if he is tired of his entire life. "One of them being that for the first time, I actually see some hope."

* * *

I do not like being idle. I cannot say where that is coming from, but ever since I was a little girl, I could never sit around, doing nothing. No, I always had to do something. My mind or my hands, perhaps even both, needed to be occupied.

That followed me as I grew up. And it would explain why I am feeling the nerves in me grow now that I am doing absolutely nothing. Daenerys is not here and even if she was in need of my help, I could not reach her, whether it is to braid her hair or give her advice.

Tyrion Lannister, Missandei, Grey Worm and I. We are ruling in her stead until her return, but there is nothing for me to do there either. No issues, no problems. Simply nothing. I do not wish for trouble, of course not. I hope it stays this way until she returns and even after.

That being said, I have too much time, too much time for me to think about things I should not be thinking about and I do not like that. I could either be alone or drinking with Tyrion Lannister and I would rather not make a habit of drinking with Tyrion Lannister.

With all this time on my hands, I caught myself going back to memories I should not have gone back to. Good or bad, past is the past and it cannot change the present. Yet, I go back.

* * *

" _If I pull your hair, warn me," I tell her as I run a comb through her silver locks. I never was the one for jealousy, even if my best friend always had more and was prettier. I knew everything had its reasons, but I was jealous of her hair and I am not ashamed to admit it. I was jealous as a child and I still am._

 _I have my own good sides, I know that, but I would kill to have hair like hers. I could braid it for hours._

" _What kind of hairstyle do you think women wear in Westeros?" Dany asks._

" _I never gave it much thought", I admit, taking a moment to consider her question. "Perhaps they wear it down more often than we do here. These are warmer regions. If I was to wear my hair down all day, every day, I would melt away."_

" _You are probably right," she laughs. "I suppose we will find out soon enough for a fact."_

" _I suppose we will," I agree. "Worry not. Everyone looks at the Queen, at least when it comes to that. Whatever hairstyle you choose to wear, they will follow you soon enough. I've seen it happen here, I am positive it will happen there as well."_

" _I would rather have them look at me as a leader, not as a hairstyle inspiration."_

" _Who's to say you cannot be both?" I ask and kept my grip firm on her hair when she started laughing. "For years, I have reassured you and promised that you are more than just a pretty face, Danny. One of these days, you will realize it. You have accepted the role you must play and you are playing it well. All that is left now is to accept the fact that others accept you as well. The Westerosi kind? They were either born with followers or they stole them from others. You gained yours. Each and every one of us that is following you made that choice by themselves. You freed them. They do not follow you because that is what they should do, what is expected of them. They do it because they want to."_

" _You say the words "Westerosi kind" with such distaste." She comments._

" _Is it noticeable?" I ask, sighing. "I try not to judge in advance. I try, believe me. But with all I've heard from many different sources, those words deserve to be said with distaste. I know that the reality must be different, but the words I heard depict savages and brutes."_

" _Milani, I am Westerosi as well," Dany tells me, turning around, making the braid I was making fall right out of my hand. "Is that what you think of me?"_

" _You were raised elsewhere," I shake my head. "Surroundings play a big role when it comes to forming a person Dany, and I am certain you know that as well. You are different. Viserys, on the other hand? I know you loved your brother, but he was no better. He was a savage in disguise."_

" _You truly did not like him?"_

" _I did, when we were all younger. Then I learned," I add, taking her hair in my hands once again and starting over. "Besides, I am well aware that those stories are always exaggerated. I simply know what I've heard, that's all."_

" _What will be when you marry one of those savages?" she asks and I start laughing._

" _Oh, Dany," I shake my head. "I could die a thousand times before that day happens. In all seriousness, I might not even live to see the day. Not to mention that I might not marry one of them. I have no title, I have no name, I have no riches. They care not for love on the other side of the sea."_

" _And they do here? Milani, I was sold to Drogo."_

" _Because your brother was a savage in disguise," I remind her. "And an idiot."_

" _I have to agree to that," she admits and we both laugh. "But it will not be as impossible as you are imagining it to be, Milani. You are my best friend. You almost died with me, more than once. I took you through a desert and we made to tell the tale. All those hours, days, horses, walking, ships, deserts and seas, you followed me through it all. If you were there for the worst, I can assure you that you will be there for the best."_

" _And I would love for that to happen, but what does that have to do with my possible marriage?"_

" _I will not leave you empty handed, Milani," I hear her say and I for one am glad I did not have to look at her as she said those words. "I know you would never ask for it, but you deserve it. You are not my maid, you are not my slave, my worker. You are my friend. And when I take my place in Westeros, I will make certain that my friend lives a comfortable life."_

" _So you will turn a poor girl from Volantis into an eligible bride?"_

" _I will make sure my friend never is hungry again," she tells me. The words she used carry a whole different meaning. I feel guilty for making assumptions. "Besides, I will not throw you into someone's arms just like that. I have hope that it will end up being your choice."_

" _What do you mean?"_

" _I do not have a family," she tells me and as she stands up and starts walking, I realize that if we keep it up this way, I will never finish her hair. She was not smiling as she stands before me. "I do not have children, brothers or sisters. I have myself. I only have myself to offer and the best way to make an alliance is with marriage. When I get to Westeros, I will need an ally. I might have luck, but luck can turn on you with the same ease it supported you. I have only myself to offer and you are the closest thing I have to a family. I need you for this. And what I can do, as your friend, as your sister, is to make sure you live a nice and comfortable life and not married to some idiot twice your age. Which I will do."_

 _I never had a particular desire to be a married women. I never even had a chance to properly consider it. My life has been my friendship with Dany. That's all it ever was. I never imagine it to be more, but it should. I should want to be married, to start a family, to become a mother. After all, why not? Dany will be a Queen. As she pointed out, I am not her maid. I am not her worker. I am someone who is fortunate enough to call her a friend. She has no one to offer but herself and she is asking for my permission to do the same with me. If she gives me coin and land she can use me as a way to bind an alliance._

 _All the while, wanting to be kind enough to actually give me a choice, a say._

 _She needed me before. I am positive that she could have done all of this without me, even if she claims otherwise. She could have done it, but it was easier with me by her side. And she needs me for this._

 _She saved my life. She is my family._

 _If she needs to give me away to someone to make her ruling stronger… I will do it._

 _I take her by the hand and smile at her._

" _We might not be sisters by blood, but Daenerys Stormborn, you are my only family. If I need to be given away, so be it," I tell her. I watch as a smile grows on her face and she pulls me in for a hug, half braided hair hitting me in the face in the process. "Please don't make me marry someone very old." I mumble._

" _I won't," she promises through laughter, pulling away from me. "I would never do that to you. I hope that it can be a man of your choosing. If things go by plan, plenty will want you. I am sure they would do so even without all I plan to give you."_

" _Dany," I warn her; she knows how I hate when she praises me in such a way. "Do not act as if I am such a great beauty. Even here, I am no more than average. In Westeros, I will be nothing more than a foreign whore to them, a foreign whore who just so happens to be a Queen's friend and adviser."_

" _You are not."_

" _I was in your brother's eyes."_

 _Dany knows all there is to know about me. Only one thing I never told her. I never mentioned the words her brother used when she was not in my company. Just as I did not mention the numerous advances he made, one I barely managed to avoid. I was never a whore, despite him calling me that._

" _Viserys was a savage in disguise," she uses the same words I did. "You are no foreign whore. You are a future bride of one of the great Houses of Westeros. You and I will be the most eligible brides Westeros had ever seen. I will have a firm hold on Westeros, and your hand will be covering mine."_

* * *

I was silent for a long time, simply standing on the balcony of my chambers, a balcony that overlooks a bigger part of Meereen. I cannot even guess for how long I was standing there. I did not move until I heard footsteps behind me, turning around to see a worried Missandei walking out on the balcony to join me.

"My lady, have you eaten today?" she asks me.

"Missandei, I am not a lady," I remind her again, for what has to be the thousandth time. It is not me pretending to be the same as she is, pretending not to be noble. The truth of the matter is, I am not noble. Perhaps I was one day, before I left Volantis. When I look back at my childhood memories, my vision was blurry, but I was either an orphan or I got stolen from my family. I have no name and no house. Despite reminding people of that daily, they seem to refuse to remember. I suppose that seeing Dany treat me with respect makes it difficult for them to act as if we are the same. "I have told you before. Just Milani. Thank you for your concern, but I am afraid my appetite is gone."

"You worry me, Milani," she admits. Hopefully, she will stick to the progress she made and remember that I am no lady. "Ever since our Queen fled, you have barely eaten."

"Missandei, when I am hungry, I eat," I tell her, "When I feel tired, I lie down and get some sleep. When I need to use a privy, I use one. There is no need to worry about me."

"You know I will worry all the same," she tells me with a small smile, "I think of what our Queen would want. She would want you to be healthy and happy and ready for the next step when she returns."

"I agree," I nod, "But I am not in trouble just yet."

"You miss her, don't you?"

"Very much so," I admit, looking away from her and down at the city I am supposed to lead while she is away. "I am standing here all day long, complaining to myself how I am doing nothing and how that makes me feel unsettled. I am complaining even if I know that if true trouble starts, I will not know what to do. There is no doubt in my mind that she will return. I simply do not know if she will have what to return to."

When I was speaking to Tyrion earlier, I was confident in our ability. I promised him before, there is no chance we will manage to lose Meereen. I was acting. Dany is the ruler, not me. I could stake my life on her ability to keep her position in Meereen, but I do not trust myself to do the job for her.

"It is normal to feel fear," Missandei tells me, "It would be foolish not to be afraid. You are not alone."

"And I am no ruler either."

"Yet you learned from the best," she smiles at me, "You learned from her. And what you lack, Tyrion Lannister might have. What I lack, Grey Wind has. He is the warrior. Tyrion is the politician. I am the former slave that can relate to others like me."

"And what am I?" I ask.

"Her voice," she tells me, "You are the only one of all of us that knows what she would think and what she would do. Any issues we might face until she returns, you will know what her decision would be. I know her well, but not as well as you do. My guess would possibly be a good one, but you know."

"I am her shadow," I shake my head, looking away from her again, "I am not complaining. In all honesty, if I am to be someone's shadow, I sure did choose the right person. But I am her shadow. I do not know who I am when I am not with her. She is like a sister to me. We grew up together and we are… a team. I am not my own person, Missandei. And I do not like that."

This is what happens when I have too much time to think. I end up pondering things I should never ponder. I open wide the doors that should remain locked for good.

"In that case, you need to find out," Missandei sighs, "It is not easy. When I was freed, I was unsure of who I was. I followed her simply because she was the one that gave me freedom. I realized that it was a good decision, but at the beginning, it was nothing more than confusion. Grey Wind felt it as well. You were there when they were all freed, Milani. You saw they considered what to do next. All their lives, they have been slaves and now that they were not… you have been her friend. You still are and you will still be, but you are also your own person. You just need to find out who that person is."

"You make it sound so simple."

"It will be the hardest thing you ever did," she says with a small smile. Well, at least she is being honest with me, "The feeling that follows will be the best you ever felt. And you being at peace with yourself will be helpful to the Queen as well." She adds.

She may be younger but she is very intelligent. Life was not always kind to me and while it would appear that I am living my moment, I remember the past quite vividly. Even so, it is nothing compared to what Missandei has been through. My belly might have been empty but I had my freedom. And there is nothing more important than one's freedom.

"You are right," I agree, offering her a small smile. "And I suppose I should start with this change in a simple way. Will you join me for supper?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello, hello! :)**

 **I'm back with a new chapter and for this one, I brought out the big guns :D A HUGE thank you to darkwolf76, who is now my beta! Or, in the GOT language, Hand of the Queen. Nah, I'm no Queen; trusted advisor :)**

 **It would not be possible without her, so yay! And do check out her GOT story, Defying Demons. It's freakin' awesome.**

 **Anyways, I hope you like this chapter. Let me know what you think!**

 **Oh and by the way; things will happen in the next chapter. BIG things.**

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* * *

Everything remained suspiciously calm for days. At first, I thought nothing of it; I was glad we had no issues to deal with, and for a moment, I thought that we would manage to keep everything in line until Dany's return. Then I realized that sounded just a little bit too good to be true.

Sons of the Harpy, burned fleet, Yunkai, Astapor and Volantis have fallen back into slave trading, and if what Lord Varys said was true, the masters are the ones that are financing the Sons of the Harpy.

My worst fears have come to life. The one fear I have had ever since Dany flew away on Drogon's back, holding on for dear life, has become a reality. All that she has done, all of her work. Everything is dangerously close to falling apart, and given that I am the one that's supposed to be holding it together, it will be my fault if everything falls. I will have failed my best friend in the worst way possible. If Dany loses her land and her people because of me, I don't know how I will be able to live with myself.

But I am only a former handmaiden. How am I supposed to rule? How could I ever live up to the Mother of Dragons?

Missandei told me, I know her better than anyone else. True as that may be, that doesn't help me know what decisions she'd make in a complex political situation like this.

The only person that can now help me keep it all in little control is Tyrion Lannister, but I do not trust Tyrion Lannister. How could I hand the control of Dany's Kingdom over to someone I do not trust? What kind of friend would that make me?

Yet, if I keep trying to do this alone, Dany will have no kingdom to come back to, because I lost it.

If I take a risk and trust Tyrion Lannister, Dany's Kingdom might actually survive.

"I understand why negotiations are needed," I sigh, conceding that he had a point. Negotiating with the Masters is our best, if not only, option. "But do you truly believe that they will agree to anything you offer, my lord?"

"You said it yourself, it is worth trying."

"And what do we do if it does not succeed?" I ask him. "I might not know a lot about ruling but is it not a bad idea to burn cities containing innocent people to the ground? I understand that people should have a healthy amount of fear when facing their ruler, but pure fear will not do anyone any good. And even if we were to choose that sort of strategy, we do not have dragons to burn anything with!"

"Negotiation, Milani," he tells me, looking at his now empty goblet. To my surprise, he does not make a move to fill it up again. "We must negotiate. We must make peace with our enemies."

"Yes, that's the desired outcome, but what if our plan doesn't work? What if the enemy does not feel the same?"

What does he expect the Masters to do? Whatever we offer them could never possibly compare to what they had before. Immense wealth and power, thousands of years of tradition, the basis for their whole culture, taken from them in an instant by one girl and her three dragons. The men we are dealing with are men who do not see a problem with selling, using, torturing and mutilating other human beings for their own gain. Should we expect them to abide by somebody else's rules?

"I wonder, Milani," Tyrion sighs, narrowing his eyes at me. It feels as if he is trying to read me, trying to understand my actions and motives. I see no problem with that, but I have made my actions and motives clear when we spoke before. On the other hand, why should he trust me if I do not trust him? After all, trust goes both ways. "You have followed the Queen everywhere she went. You have shared your life with an entire hoard of Dothraki. You have fed dragons. And yet, you are afraid of men. Simple men. Why?"

"The Masters are not simple men, my lord," I disagree. "They are men who have no morals, men who only care for themselves and who would do anything possible to keep their heads intact. That is the most dangerous kind there is. Dragons? They do not burn you if your approach is careful. They do not burn you if you treat them with respect. Dothraki? They are no less human than you and I. Them being raised in different ways than ours does not take away from their humanity. And one should never underestimate _simple_ men. Simple men can take, burn, and kill as well as anyone else, and very quickly become something to be feared."

After all, Daenerys Targaryen was once a simple woman. And from a simple woman, she became Daenerys Stormborn of the House Targaryen, First of Her Name, the Unburnt, Queen of the Andals and the First Men, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, Breaker of Chains, and Mother of Dragons.

She might have been a simple woman once but after watching her rise from ashes, three dragons on her… Simple men, and women, are the ones that cause worry, simply because they have nothing to lose and a lot to gain. If there is one lesson I have learned in my entire life, it was to never underestimate simple men.

"Are you not from one of those cities?" Tyrion asks.

"Yes, I am," I confirm. "I was born in the Free City of Volantis. Have you ever been to Volantis?"

"No, I'm afraid. I did meet some Volantene whores."

"Of course you did," I chuckle, choosing not to take his comment to heart. "I left Volantis when I was still a child. Someone took me. Who, I cannot say. From whom, I do not know. I was too young to remember and possibly too frightened to pay attention. When I think of Volantis, I remember two things. One, the Long Bridge, over the Rhoyne river. Having heard of it, it was fairly easy for me to pull it out of my memory. And the second thing is the slaves. You say you've known Volantene whores. I know men rarely pay attention to faces of whores, but whores from Volantis have marks."

"Tattoos," Tyrion recalls. "A triangle."

"Actually, a tear," I correct him. "Not many know that. Poetic, isn't it? That is what the men we are going to deal with do. They put tears on faces of women, beautiful women at that. Why? To mark them. To set them apart. Every slave, _every slave_ , depending on the work they do, has a tattoo on their face. If a slave touches a noble without directions to do so, they are punished. And do you know the punishment?"

"I imagine I do," he sighs. At the very least, he sounds troubled by it. "Dothraki are raised differently and so are the people in the Free Cities."

"Are they? Queen Daenerys was raised in the Free Cities, moving from one place to another. I was raised in the Free Cities. Are we the same as they are?"

"Queen Daenerys was raised in the Westerosi legacy."

"And what of me?"

"You were raised with her."

"Are you saying I am more Westerosi than Volantene?" I ask.

"Perhaps," he shrugs his shoulders. I do my best not to show just how insulted I am with those words. "You see Westerosi as brutes and savages, those who steal and kill and murder. Think of the words you have used to describe the Masters. Is there any difference?"

"Brutes and savages, yes. But slavery has been abolished."

"It has," he agrees. "But from your view, is there anyone good enough?"

"Good enough for what?"

"To be rulers of anything?"

"My lord, I do not think all Westerosi are savages. Neither do I think all of us from Free Cities are despicable. I am not daft. Each side has heroes and villains. I have prejudices that perhaps I shouldn't have. I am not trying to deny it. In fact, I hope to fight it. But I was raised on the other side of the sea, my lord. Do the people of Westeros not have prejudices against us? Neither side is innocent. Both have blood on their hands. People still suffer on both sides of the sea because of the greed of rulers. The only difference is in how they suffer and what they are called.

"Friendship aside, I can see why the Queen values your council. You can look beyond your own opinions, to see the reality of each situation. You do not like me, yet you work with me. You have led a life that rulers do not get a chance to lead. You know what they don't," he tells me, raising his empty goblet as if he was toasting to my honor. "With a little more experience, you could make quite the ruler. Whether you wish for it or not, power suits you."

"Well I do not wish for it, so let us hope my wishes do matter in the end."

"I think you would do well with power," he narrows his eyes at me again, as if he was imagining a vision of me as a person of power. "Those who want it get drunk far too easily. They have one taste of it and they want more. More, more, more. It matters not how much they have; they always want more. When drunk, people tend to make questionable decisions. And power gives you the worst headache," he chuckles. "Those who do not want power? Well, if they end up with it, they often don't know how to act on it. King Robert was not a good King, but he never wanted to be a King to begin with."

"He was a usurper."

"No, he was a man fighting for the woman he loved."

"History is written by the winners," I tell him, shaking my head. "Winners write a biased history."

"As do losers," he shakes his head. "The only difference is that people listen to winners alone."

"Does that imply that the reality, the true history, falls somewhere in between?" I ask.

"Absolutely," Tyrion agrees. "Whether called a usurper or a brave and heroic rebel, Robert ended up with a crown on his head; a crown he did not want. Still, he was a better King than Joffrey ever was. Joffrey was drunk with power. Robert was drunk with wine." He concludes.

"I might not get drunk on power, my lord, but that does not mean I am capable," I tell him. I do not possess the wisdom or charisma needed to be a good ruler; I just try to be honest about what I see in front of me. Whether it is me or someone else, I always do my best to speak the truth and to keep a realistic view. I tell Dany, without holding back, if I find her decision to be a wrong one. And like a true ruler, she listens to me, taking my opinion into consideration before coming up with a finally decision. Sometimes she listens to me, other times, she does not. Which is exactly what she should do as a queen; be intelligent enough to listen to the opinions of those she finds trustworthy and then make a decision herself. At times I have been right and at times I have been wrong. I do not think I have any sort of capability when it comes to ruling. I simply have common sense and I do my best to keep a firm grip on it, but that is where my abilities end. "I have more to learn. More than I ever thought I would."

"And you are learning as we go," he tells me, offering me a small smile. "Which is exactly why we must negotiate. Fighting fire with fire is not always a smart choice, even if one side has _dragon_ fire. Negotiations are necessary, even if they sometimes are useless." He gives me a pointed look.

"You too believe that they will disagree?" I ask in surprise.

"Yes," he confirms my suspicions. "Which changes nothing."

"Then why do it if it is useless? Why waste time on it?"

"Because then they will believe they can already bend us to their will and think we are less of a threat," he tells me. "Tell me, are we bending to their will if we are the ones to set the negotiations and agreement on the first place?" he asks.

It takes me a moment. Once I realize it, I know I should have seen it all before.

"You want them to think that they've backed us into a corner, that we've run out of options, don't you?" I ask, feeling a smile creeping up on my face as all the pieces fell into their right place. "You want them to think that we are negotiating because we have nothing else to do."

"Exactly." He confirms.

"That is… quite a wicked plan. But we do not have anything else to do, do we?" I ask. The plan would have been a whole lot better if there was another part to it. Despite him not offering the plan on a silver platter to begin with, I believe he would have told me about another part, if there was one.

"By the time negotiations are over, we will." He reassures me.

"Any plan is better than no plan," I shrug, still trying to realize whether the plan is as brilliant as I first thought it was. I am more confused than I was before. "That is one mighty gamble, lord Tyrion."

"If one does not gamble, how will they ever win?"

* * *

 _When I was younger, Dany pointed out that I had a good understanding of colors. At first, I was confused by her statement; what is there to understand about colors after all?_

 _It took me a few years to understand what she meant. I was the one who would coordinate the colors of the flowers placed her chambers. I was the one who suggested she should avoid a certain color combination for her dresses. I was the one who often had fingers dirty from paint and clay._

 _Far from an extraordinary talented artist, I did have more knowledge than an average person._

 _And lately, I had been focused on blue._

 _In my eyes, blue was the color of freedom. The sky, the thing that has no limitations, was blue. The sea, something very much uncontrollable, was blue. Dany was wearing blue clothing I chose for her the day she freed the Unsullied and rest of the slavers from Astapor._

 _I was so immersed into my work, I did not even notice I was alone. Only when Daario Naharis walked up to me did I lift my head up and notice that someone had entered the room._

" _Am I interrupting you?" he asks, smiling down at me._

" _Not really," I shake my head. "I am not doing anything that requires great concentration."_

" _That is exquisite," he comments, looking over my shoulder at the canvas before me. "You are very talented, Milani."_

" _I am painting with my fingers," I turn around, looking at him suspiciously; something is not right here. "It is a mess and it looks horrible. Why are you complimenting something not worth complimenting?"_

" _You should try looking at it from a different angle then," he suggests. He lowers himself, so that his face was leveled with mine. Alarmed, I decide not to do anything. After all, he was looking at my work and not at me. "The lighter blue in the corner makes the rest of the canvas brighter." He notices, pointing at the blob of color._

" _Can I help you with something, Daario?" I ask. There was no need for me to attack him, not yet that is, but I had to make it known that he was too close for me to feel comfortable with it. When he turned his head around to look at me, it was even worse; our faces were only inches away._

" _Can't I admire from afar?"_

" _Whatever it is that you are admiring, it is not from afar." I tell him. I could feel the heat in my cheeks; without a doubt, I was red in the face. I do not like this, I do not like this at all._

" _I thought you were kinder than that," he tells me in a low voice, slowly coming closer to me._

" _I am kind enough," I manage to utter. I could feel his breath on my neck. He was too close for it to be acceptable. I knew I did not want him this close to me, I could feel it in my bones, but when I decided to move away, I could not do it. It is as if my body is refusing to follow my commands. "Daario, I think you should-" I start, but as I turn my head, I make the worst mistake possible._

 _Before I could fully comprehend what was going on, his lips were on mine as he kissed me. It was not like I have imagined it to be. I imagined my first kiss to be gentle, full of love, hidden passion and meaning. I did not expect Daario Naharis to take away from me the ability to breathe._

 _My common sense was telling me that I should enjoy the kiss. Daario has to be a good kisser and my body acted on its own accord; I got up from my seat and I threw my hands over his neck, bringing the two of us closer together as our kiss deepened. My body wanted this kiss to last forever, but my mind was thinking differently. And more than that, my heart. My heart was screaming her name._

 _Dany is with Daario. And here I am, kissing him._

 _As soon as I thought of her, reality pulled me back in, gripping me tightly. I snap, jumping away from Daario, watching as he struggled to catch his breath. He had blue paint all over his face and his hair was ruffled._

 _I have seen his infatuation with Daenerys. I was the one who pointed it out to her. She was either blind to it or purposely turned her head in a different direction. Daario was mad about her, I have seen it with my own two eyes. And here he is now; kissing me, looking as if he had thoroughly enjoyed the experience._

" _Do not ever do that again," I warn him, surprising myself with how menacing I sounded. "If you ever touch me again, I will tell the Queen everything and your head will be on a spike by sunfall."_

" _She told me to do it."_

" _What?"_

" _Go and ask her, if you don't believe me," he chuckles. It felt as if he was laughing at my stupidity. I am more insulted by that than by the kiss itself. "You can pretend all you want, Milani. You liked that kiss. In fact, you want another one." His voice is tender, making him sound surprisingly seductive. I take one step back before he took the chance to come closer to me again. I could see traces of my painted fingers over his face and neck. I did not want that kiss, but the evidence proves otherwise._

" _I did like the kiss," I admit, realizing it would be useless and embarrassing of me to even try to deny it. "But I do not want another one. If you do it again, you will pay for it." I warn him. Hopefully, my threats will end up being empty. If he does challenge faith, I cannot say what I will do._

 _Before he could continue the conversation, I leave the room in a rush. I do not want to be anywhere near him. Not to mention that his words still lingered in my mind._

 _She told me to do it._

 _It makes no sense. Even if she did it, I cannot keep it a secret. Keeping it a secret could end up costing me my head. For all I know, Daario will turn around and tell her that I was the one who started the kiss. Besides, I cannot keep secrets from Dany. She knows everything there is to know about me._

" _Milani," she smiles when I walk into her chambers. It takes her less than a moment to realize that something is wrong. "What is the matter?" She asks, her eyes wide._

" _Daario Naharis kissed me," I mumble, looking down at my own feet. "Dany, I did not want it to happen. I do not know what came over him; he has never acted in such a way before. I was confused and I did not react straight away and I had no idea what I was doing and… I pulled away as soon as I realized. I am… I am so sorry."_

 _I believe this is the first time I actually apologized to her. For something of relevance. I might have apologized if I had pulled her hair a bit too tightly our something similar, but I have never done anything to hurt her, anything to anger her. Well, anything to apologize for. Not until now._

 _As soon as I told her what Daario did, I felt guilty. Not only towards her._

" _I do not know what caused such behavior," I speak up again, feeling an unexplainable urge to defend Daario. He might have done what he did, but I did not want to see his head on a spike because of it. I cannot say what her reaction could be, but I do not want him dead because of one stupid mistake. "For all I know, I might have given him reason to think I would want him to act in such away; perhaps I did it without even realizing it. He did not force himself on me. When I stepped away, he allowed me to do so. I am so sorry, my Queen."_

" _Milani," Dany speaks up; her tone was not as strict as I expected it to be. Fighting the urge to keep my eyes on the floor, I manage to lift my head up and look at her. She does not look angry. She does not even look troubled. "I told him to do it."_

" _You did what?"_

" _I told him to kiss you."_

" _He told me as much, but I did not believe it," I shake my head. I no longer felt the need to keep my eyes on the floor. The feelings rising up in me… I almost feel betrayed. "Dany, why would you do that?" I ask._

 _I do not understand. Not once, not once did I show any kind of interested in Daario. As far as I can remember, he did not show any interest in me either. He was warming her bed, not mine. I never told or showed Dany in any possible way that it might be something I would look forward to._

" _Because you are lonely, Milani," she tells me. It did not sound as if she is defending herself; it sounded more like she was stating the obvious. "I know how horrible that feels like."_

" _You do not know that, Dany."_

" _You have never been with a man."_

" _And that means nothing," I shake my head. "Me being a maiden has nothing to do with loneliness. I could have been with men if I wanted to. I am alone. I am not lonely. There is a difference."_

" _Are you not lonely?"_

" _No," I shake my head. "And even if I was, did I ever say anything that would make you think that I want to be kissed by Daario? Or anyone? You never had a reason to believe that, Dany. I never gave you a reason. You just… you simply concluded and no matter what I say…"_

" _Milani, I had no ill intentions," she speaks up. By the looks of it, she finally realized that I am hurt. "I told him to kiss you. It was not an order; he would not do it if he did not want to. And I told him to give up if you showed any sort of disagreement with it. I never meant to insult you. I just… I thought you might not want to be lonely anymore. I know how horrible it feels and I did not want you to feel it. And Daario… he is a good man. He would treat you well."_

" _Before returning to your bed," I add. "I see why you did what you did. I do not agree with it but I see your reasoning. What hurts me… what hurts me the most is that you were willing to offer me Daario, a man you took for yourself. Do you truly believe I would ever be interested in a man that you had?" I ask, feeling tears rolling down my cheek. I thought I was in control. I thought I wouldn't cry. "You are a Queen and I am nobody. I never questioned that. Nobody I might be, but I also thought I was your friend. Tell me, does a friend deserve a plaything you tired of? You have gotten all you can from him, so you throw your scraps to me? Is that what I deserve, after everything we have been through?"_

" _Milani, please," she begs me, getting up from her chair and walking my way. "You know it is not like that. I never thought about you in such a way."_

" _Your words say one thing, but your actions speak for themselves," I take a deep breath, feeling that I will no longer be able to control the tears. Perhaps I'd always thought of myself as simply her shadow, a nobody with no purpose but her, yet I had always taken comfort in believing she saw me as more than that, that she thought of me as her friend, a person whom supported and challenged her, not some pet that was just a mere extension of herself. I need to get away from her. "You need not worry about my loneliness, Your Grace. If I ever feel troubled by it, I should find a solution for it myself. If I may be excused." I say. I dared her. I dared her to stop me. Never once, in all these years, not once did I defy her. What she said, I did, without questioning it. Now, I dared her to try and stop me._

 _She did not. When she nodded her head, I knew she could understand just how much I was hurt._

* * *

I remember that day too clearly for my liking. More than the events that transpired, I remember how I felt. I could not forget about that, no matter how hard I tried. And I did.

It was the first and only time that Dany managed to hurt my feelings with words or actions of hers. I was really hurt by it. I felt disrespected, betrayed, idiotic.

Not even her good intentions were enough to erase the pain. Yes, she sent Daario because she knew, first hand, that he knows how to pleasure a woman properly. That was very thoughtful of her, but it felt as if she was throwing me a man she had enough of.

Even if she did not, she showed that she would feel comfortable with the two of us sharing a man. I cannot understand that, not for the life of me. It's as if I am so close to her, so entwined, that she doesn't view me as my own person. She didn't even consider that I might not take the man that she did or that I might have wishes and views regarding that sort of thing. That bothers me.

If I am to be with someone, I want to be with them completely. I do not want to wonder if they have another woman on their mind. I do not want someone who is with me out of duty. Which is sad, given that I will probably be married off to some old and rich lord that could help Dany win her throne.

I could never do that. Even if I was madly in love with Daario, I could never do that. And I will never understand how in the world Dany thought that was a good idea.

She apologized. Apologizing is not something she does easily, or often. It meant a lot to me, but it did not erase the disappointment. The anger went away fast enough, but disappointment lingered.

Is it possible that she knows me so little that she actually thought I would consider that a good idea? Is it possible that she does not know me at all, when I know her like the palm of my hand?

All those years, we have been together, whether it was good or bad. It did not matter what I did or what she did, we always know, without a trace of doubt, that the other one will always have our back. I knew I could rely on Dany, that I could ask her for anything and that so long as she had it in her power, my wish will be granted. And Dany knew, Dany knew very well that I would kill someone with my own bare hands in order to protect her. I know everything there is to know about her and she, with that one mistake, showed me that she might not know me at all.

I try not to hold it against her, I try to not hold a grudge, but no matter how fast I run, it follows me.

And now here I am, struggling to keep her Kingdom after she insulted me in such a way.

Looking back, I do not think I was ever selfish in my entire life. Not ever. Certainly not at her expense. I have put her first, when I was her handmaiden, when I was her best friend and when I was her adviser. Always, it was Dany first. I do not consider that a mistake, but for a while now, I have been feeling as if that will end badly for me.

"Milani," Grey Worm's voice made me jump out of my own skin. "Sorry."

"Grey Worm, you scared the life out of me," I struggle to breath, with a hand over my chest, feeling my heart beat way faster than it should have. "I know you are trained to sneak up on people, but don't do that to me. I am not an enemy."

"I am sorry, Milani," he apologizes, even if he does not look sorry. Grey Worm never shows emotion. Not if it is positive, nor if it is negative. Come to think of it, I do not think I have ever seen him smile. "Lord Tyrion told Grey Worm to find Milani. Masters are here. Milani speak to them."

"No," I shake my head in confusion. "No, absolutely not. That was never part of the plan."

"Grey Worm say what Lord Tyrion say."

"Well, Grey Worm say to Lord Tyrion that Milani say no," I tell him. I stop to take a deep breath and to remind myself that none of it is Grey Worm's fault; he is simply acting as a messenger. "I cannot do it, Grey Worm. I am sure Lord Tyrion will understand. I cannot risk it all; I do not trust myself to remain calm and collected, to not react to what I might hear. If I react, I might ruin the entire plan. I cannot do it. Tell that to Lord Tyrion. He will understand."

"But what of Grey Worm and Missandei?" he asks. "How are we to speak? Milani speak for us."

"You both have your tongues, Grey Worm," I smile at him. "I promise I will speak up for you if needed, but I cannot do it today. Not if we want to have an upper hand."

"Grey Worm understand," he nods. "Grey Worm tell Milani everything after the meeting."

"Thank you, Grey Worm," I smile at the man. It does not come as a surprise when the only thing I get in return is a stiff nod of his head before he turns around and leaves.

I have put all of my trust in Tyrion Lannister's hands and I have never felt more frightened in my life.


	4. Chapter 4

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* * *

"Negotiations!" I seethe, glaring him down. "Negotiations are our best bet, that's what you told me! I was foolish enough to believe you!"

"Milani, they _did_ agree-"

"And they have broken that agreement, which is something I warned you might happen!" I snap in response. Now is not the time for him to try to act reasonable. "I told you not to trust them, not with ease. You already offered them too much and look at us now!" I shout, and it is as if they could hear me; the moment I open my arms, a loud bang carries through the Pyramid. The ground didn't shake too much, so I imagine that they had only managed to hit the ground nearby, not the actual Pyramid, I think with relief.

"I can do better," Tyrion tells me, panic clearly visible in his eyes. "If I just talk to them again, I'll be-"

"Talk to them again?" I laugh in disbelief. "What are you going to do? What, are you going to walk outside and take a little stroll through a bloody battlefield?" I yell. I don't have to step foot outside to know that we are confined to this Pyramid. We are surrounded, with no hope for victory, no hope for escape. We have failed our queen. _I_ have failed my best friend.

"You are not the only one that rules in her place." He warns me.

"Neither are you! There are four of us on the small council, and two did not want negotiations. Only one did and one stupidly gave in. Giving in to your foolish idea is the worst thing I have ever done," I say. I will never stop blaming myself for this. I was the one who convinced Grey Worm and Missandei that we should follow his lead. If I had only stopped him, which was in my power, we wouldn't be under attack. "You have lost your say, my lord. We did it your way and now we might lose Meereen and die. We are no longer doing things your way and don't you dare try to stop me!"

He doesn't. As I march down the halls, he follows me. I want to shout at him to stay away, but I can't do that. He is still a part of the Small Council, even if he is the fool who brought us into this mess in the first place. As much as I want to send him away, I can't do that. As much as I hate to admit, I might still need him.

I don't trust my instincts, even after Dany always told me, time and time again, that I should. As she would say, even if I ended up making mistakes, I would have at least make a judgement I truly believed in. I should have listened to her. I felt it in my bones; I had known it was a bad idea to negotiate with them. Men who trade human beings like cattle… it should not come as a surprise that they do not stick to the deal they made.

But no. I am a stupid little woman with no military experience, a nobody. Everything I know, I learned from Dany and even she has made horrible mistakes in the past. I hadn't thought that I had it in me. No, I had believed Tyrion Lannister to be far more experienced and qualified to do this in her stead. I had thought that he knew what he was talking about, that he knew how to deal with men like the Masters. I put my faith in his hands. No, I put all of our faiths in his hands. I was the only one who could have stopped him and I didn't do it. Why? Because I am a bloody fool, that's why. I let my own insecurities put us into this position. If I had only a little bit of faith in myself, a little bit of faith in Dany's judgement about me, I would have fought for my stance. If I had stood my ground, if I had insisted that we do it my way, our way, we would not be in this position.

She will kill me for this. If I live long enough to see her again, that is.

"Milani, what are you going to do now?" Tyrion asks as he is running behind me, trying to catch up. I didn't take into consideration that he is a dwarf. I may be of average height for a woman my age, but my steps are much larger than his. I didn't care enough to slow down. He didn't deserve my consideration right now.

"I'm going to speak to Grey Worm." I tell him, knowing that I should still inform him of our actions. As the commander of the Unsullied, I can only hope that Grey Worm has an idea on how to deal with this.

"What are you going to do then?" He asks.

"I don't know, I still have to speak to him," I roll my eyes. "I imagine we will do the exact opposite of what you might suggest."

"Milani," he tries to speak to me again as I walk into the hall where Grey Worm, Missandei and some of the Unsullied are waiting for us. "I was wrong, I admit it."

Too little too late. "That changes nothing."

"The Unsullied could-"

"No more talking from you," Grey Worm speaks up before I had a chance to. "You talking got into us this."

"And I have acknowledged that," Tyrion defends himself. "I'm trying to-"

"You're trying to tell me what the army should do. You do not know what the army should do."

"Alright," Tyrion sighs and this time, he accepts his defeat. Grey Worm and I are both angry and we did not hold back. Unlike us, Missandei did hold back her anger, but I could see the way her eyes narrowed as she watches him. It should have been the three of us. If we hadn't given in, if I hadn't insisted that we should give in, we would not be in this situation now. "What should the army do?"

"We not go to the beach," Grey Worm tells us, frowning. "If we go to the beach, the Masters will take the Pyramid. The Pyramid is the only place in the city we can defend. We stay here."

I am proud beyond words. He is an Unsullied. I knew he was brave and a great warrior, but I have also watched him coming to terms with his new role and purpose. He had been chosen by his own comrades to be Dany's commander and he is now a part of a Queen's Small Council. That is a big step for a soldier who did not speak unless spoken to not that long ago. I feel proud watching him now, speaking up, standing behind his opinions.

"And then?" Tyrion asks.

"We wait for them to come to us."

I do not like the sound of that, but I would much rather have the Unsullied here, where they stand a chance, ready to fight than out there, leaving the Pyramid unprotected and marching into certain death.

"I understand why we should do that," I say, looking at Grey Worm now. He is the military man here; he is the only one that needs to hear me out. "And we will do that, but is there a way to help those people? We cannot just sit here and wait for them to come to us while they kill all the people that are not hiding away."

"If we do that, we lose the Pyramid," he shakes his head. "Did you see outside?"

As a matter of fact, I did not. As soon as I realize that, I walk out onto the balcony.

Smoke and ash fill the air. I can barely see, between the smoke and the darkness of the night. The only light comes from the fire they are throwing at us. I watch on, numb, as they launch another fire ball and manage to hit the Pyramid. The ground does not shake, but it doesn't have to. Seeing this was bad enough; I do not need the ground to shake to realize it. It looks like a battlefield, or what I imagined a battlefield would look like, but it is really the scene of a massacre. I… I have never been more afraid in my life. Standing here, looking at the mess below, taking in all the chaos and destruction… I don't see how we can win.

As I walk back inside, I see a look of understanding on both Missandei and Grey Worm's faces. It is all different when you actually see it. And that is the problem. Seeing it only made me feel worse about all the innocent people left outside to die, Dany's people. People that she freed and who swore allegiance to her because they believed she would provide them peace, only for them to be slaughtered. First by the hands of the Sons of the Harpy, and now by the hands of the Masters. They have been dying because she would not back down. And because of that, now we will not want to back down. We even tried to compromise with the Masters to stop those deaths, yet they are still dying. If this does not stop, it is only a matter of time before the people turn their backs on her. If she ever returns. If they live long enough to do that.

"Grey Worm, we must think of something," I plead with him, desperate to find a solution. "We can't just let them all die. That is not what the Queen would do." If I am here to speak as someone who knows what she would do, then I'm going to do it. I know she would have listened to Tyrion if she was in our position. I know it and I suppose that is exactly why I listened to him. If that ended up being a mistake, like it did, I know Dany wouldn't just sit calmly while innocent people were being murdered.

"We don't have a choice." He tells me.

"We can't just leave them outside like that, unprotected!" I snap. I'm not angry at him, not nearly as much as I am angry at Tyrion. Grey Worm didn't do anything wrong. "We have to think of something!"

"What?" Grey Wind asks. "You want to ride dragon? Or you want me to ride dragon?" he asks me, knowing all too well that Dany is the only one that can do that. Viserion or Rhaegal would not let me near them, let alone on their backs. It doesn't work that way.

"I don't know what we should do!" I yell. "You are the commander of an army, not me. But as a part of the Queen's Small Council I can't sit here, comfortable and protected while innocent people are being killed in the streets, just because they are free! I can't! We need to think of something! "

"Perhaps some Unsullied should venture outside after all?" Missandei suggests.

"I would send them to their deaths if I made them go out." Grey Worm shakes his head.

"We might all die anyway," I mumble. Tyrion, Missandei and Grey Worm look at me in surprise. "What? They have more troops and resources than we do. You think we will live to see another day? Another day, perhaps. More than one, I doubt it. If they keep it up this way, they will get to the Pyramid. When they come in, they will murder us all in vengeance."

"They paid to fight," Grey Worm shakes his head again. "We fight to live. We fight for our Queen."

"And your Queen isn't here!" I stop and take a deep breath to calm myself. I don't want to continue this as a shouting match. "How are the four of us supposed to rule in her stead if we can't agree on a single damned thing? How are we supposed to rule when they are going to kill us?"

The ground shakes again; this time, it's not only the ground. I look around, wide eyed, listening to the sounds on top of us. We were at the very top of the Pyramid, at the highest level, a level they should be unable to reach. Until now. We all listen as we hear someone walking. Footsteps on the balcony.

Everyone grabs a weapon; I grab a knife, watching as Grey Worm and the other Unsullied that are in the room with us get into formation. Missandei looks at me, holding a blade herself and I nod my head in response. Despite our inexperience, if we have to defend ourselves, we can and will do it. And if someone is going to kill me, I'll make sure that I do not go down without a fight. Gripping the blade in my hand, I watch as one of the Unsullied opens the door and walks out, spear at the ready.

My eyes go wide as the Unsullied pulls back and kneels. I watch in shock as Dany marches into the room, looking around at each of us. She does not look happy.

But she is alive. And in one piece. As much as I can see through my blurry eyes, she at least appears healthy.

Despite knowing better, I find myself running to her, crying like a babe.

* * *

" _Should I steal us some melons from the kitchens?" I giggle._

" _If you can, yes," Dany encourages me. "Just be careful not to get caught."_

" _Dany, when am I ever caught?" I wink as I close the door behind me, ignoring her laughter. Pentos nights are warm enough for me to walk barefoot, without feeling cold. People walk bare foot and wear light dresses in Pentos. If I could, I would have us stay here forever._

 _But I know we can't. Where her brother goes, Dany follows. And I follow her. As much as I would like to call Pentos my home for good, I know that will not happen._

" _Going somewhere?" a voice startles me. I breathe out a sigh of relief when I turn around and realize that it is only Viserys. I start laughing._

" _You scared me to death, Your Grace."_

" _No, that would be such a shame," he smiles at me. "And I told you before, Milani. Call me by my name."_

" _You shouldn't sneak around like this, Viserys," I smile at him. "You might interrupt someone while they're trying to sneak around."_

" _What are you doing out of your bed this late at night?"_

" _I couldn't sleep and neither could your sister," I explain. "What about you? Sleepless nights?"_

" _Well, yes. I thought I would find a way to keep myself entertained." He comments._

" _You can always join us," I suggest, even if I didn't know for sure if Dany wishes to be in the company of her brother. She loves him very much, but they don't always get along well. I'm not sure if today is one of their good days or one of their bad days. "I was just going down the kitchens to get us some food."_

" _I had another form of entertainment in mind, but thank you for the invitation," he smiles at me. "In fact…" he tells me as he starts walking towards me. "That other form of entertainment I had in mind… I think you would suffice." He tells me, his face so close to mine our noses almost touched._

" _Viserys, I don't think you should-" he stops me by putting his finger over my mouth._

" _Shhh," he whisper; his tone is a warning of itself. "I have always wondered what you've got under that dress, Milani. I have had a peek or two, but never close enough." he tells me. As he is walking closer to me, I pull back, backing directly into the wall. He laughs as he puts his hands on each side of my head, pinning me. There is barely any space left between our bodies and I feel panic rising in my chest._

" _Viserys, please don't do this," I shake my head, thinking how I must sound like an idiot. As if a future King would ever make advances? What am I thinking?! Of course he's not! He is just playing with me! But if he is playing with me, why is he playing with one of the straps that kept my dress in place. "Viserys, please." I say, calming myself down, knowing that I am not in a position to cause a scene._

" _Oh, please," he chuckles, pulling the strap down, revealing my breast. "You like the idea of it as much as I do. And I truly like the idea of it," he admits, looking down at my chest. I am ready to push him away, but he beat me to it. His lips connect to my neck. Ignoring the panic that I felt raging inside me, I try to focus on how lucky I am that he did not kiss me on the lips. And that honor will never go to him. Never. I would rather die. Knowing that I could very well pay for this with my head, I push him away from me, watching as he staggers backwards as I pull my dress back up._

" _I begged you," I tell him, silencing the part of my mind that was telling me that I was speaking to a rightful King of some faraway land. A King or not, he should know what refusal means. "I am not a whore and you are well aware of that. Do not treat me like one." I warn him._

" _Do you know that striking your King is considered treason?" he growls at me._

" _I did not strike you. I pushed you away from me. And you are not my King. I was born in a foreign land and I live in a foreign land. Until you have a crown on your head, you are no King of mine."_

" _How dare you speak to me like that?" he yells._

" _How dare you force yourself on me?" I ask in a level tone, trying hard not to yell back at him. As much as I hate it, he still has more power than I do. I can't yell at him, but I can push him away if he tries again._

" _You are nothing," he tells me, staring me directly into eyes. "Nothing, Milani. Nothing."_

" _You are right," I nod my head, ignoring the hurt that started rising in me, caused by his words. "I am nothing. And I belong to no one. Not to you, not to anyone. Do not touch me like this again, Viserys. It will be better for the both of us if we pretend as if this never happened."_

 _I do not wait for his response, knowing that it is not something I needed to hear. I turn around and walk away, changing the direction I was going in. instead of going to the kitchen, I walk to Dany's chambers, which I never should have left to begin with._

" _What happened?" Dany asks me as I close the door behind me. "Did someone catch you?"_

" _No," I reassure her, forcing a smile on my face. "They just locked the doors. I returned before someone could see me."_

* * *

I was not surprised when she said she wished to speak to me, as soon as we informed her of what has been happening since she fled. Missandei, Tyrion Lannister, Grey Worm and I were speaking over each other, each trying to explain it from their point of view. As soon as she managed to understand what has happened, she said she wanted to speak to me in private.

So, I told her everything. Every little thing that has happened, from the moment Ser Jorah and Daario ran to her rescue until the moment Drogon landed on the top of the Pyramid.

She was silent, which was not a surprise. She allowed me to finish my story and then, she stayed silent some more. And with each passing moment, the guilt I felt inside of me kept growing.

"I tried," I finally speak up, feeling the need to defend myself. "We all did. Tyrion Lannister, he… his decision was stupid, just as it was stupid of me to allow him to follow it through. It was very stupid, but he had no ill intentions. I might be angry at him, but I know he did not envision this as a possible outcome. We all tried, Dany. We tried and we failed. None of us were ready for it."

Usually, when I speak to her, it doesn't feel as if I am speaking to a Queen. At all times, it feels as if I am talking to my friend, to my sister. Now, more than ever, I know I am speaking to a Queen.

"When the morning comes, Daario Naharis will lead all of the Dothraki into Meereen," she tells me. "Every Khalasar that was in Vaes Dothrak will be riding behind him."

"Dothraki?" I ask in surprise. "Where did you find the Dothraki?"

"In Vaes Dothrak," she tells me with surprising composure, pausing to take a sip of wine. "When Drogon helped me escape the attack, he flew me all the way to the other side of Essos. They found me. When they tried to make me join the dosh khaleen, I showed them that fire cannot harm a dragon."

When she speaks of herself as a dragon… it still sends shivers down my spine. She is the last living Targaryan. She _is_ the Mother of Dragons. I have seen what those dragons can do and I have seen what she can do with them, but whenever I hear her speak of herself as if she was a dragon, all I can think of is how Viserys said the same. That did not end well for him and I can't help being afraid that it will not end well for Dany either. After all, he never was the ideal role model. He would've become a mad tyrant had he lived to be king. I don't want Dany to turn into one.

"Daario and Ser Jorah found you? And they are coming tomorrow?"

"Daario is," she tells me. "Ser Jorah… I sent him away."

"Dany," I sigh, closing my eyes for a moment. "Why did you do that? Did he not redeem himself?"

"He did," she agrees, "But if he is going to be by my side, I need him alive and well, not covered in grey scale." She tells me. I want to ask so many questions, but my questions can wait.

"With the Dothraki and the Unsullied, do we have enough to defeat the Masters?" I ask.

"You forgot to mention three dragons," she corrects me. It feels surreal, talking to her for as long as I do, without her offering a single smile in my direction. "We shall meet with them tomorrow morning. And then, I will burn them all."

For a moment, I think it is simply a joke. No smile appears, however, no laughter. She means it.

"You sound more and more like him, with each passing day," I tell her, instantly regretting it.

"Viserys was not a dragon." She says in a eerie tone, frowning down at me.

"No, he wasn't. But he liked fire. And from what you told me, so did your father."

"Do not use that against me, Milani," she warns me. "You know how difficult it has been for me to live with the legacy of being the Mad King's daughter."

"I am not using anything against you," I disagree, shaking my head frantically. "I would never do that. What I am saying is… people remember, Dany. Those people who you want to rule over? They remember your father. If they see a dragon lady with an affinity for fire…"

"I am not talking about Westeros. I am talking about saving Meereen."

"And word travels fast," I cut in. "If they find out that you burned an entire army…"

"What do you suggest then? I should allow them to do this? I should sit back and enjoy the view why they burn my city, my people?"

"That is not what I am suggesting!" I snap. "Damn it Dany, when did you become so impulsive?"

"Impulsive?" she asks, wide eyed.

"Yes, impulsive. The moment I disagree with you, you jump on me. You treat me as if I am trying to sabotage you on purpose, when all I've ever done is support you. And right now I'm trying to remind you of the kind of queen you have told me you have always wanted to be, of the person you _are._ Yes, I know that doing the right thing is not always successful. In fact, I am one of the reasons Meereen is under attack. I could have done better and I am sorry that I didn't, but I am not your enemy. I am your friend."

"This is not a game, Milani," she tells me, scowling. "This is life or death. Win or lose."

"I never thought it was a game. I understand how much is at stake. I might not be educated, or a ruler, or of noble birth, but I am no idiot Dany. I thought you knew that." I pause for a moment, and swallow hard, pushing away my petty hurts. "It doesn't matter anymore. You are here now. You can do this on your own. You have no use for me anymore."

I did not expect to be as angry as I am. In fact, I did not think anger was a possibility. I feel guilt for not doing my job well. I just didn't think I'd have the luxury to feel anger too. Seeing Dany act in such a way… I can't explain what is happening to me.

She never pointed it out, but I feel it all the same. I grew up knowing that I was a nobody. If I acted as her shadow for all these years, can I truly blame her for treating me as a shadow?

I am nothing, but I am still human. I make mistakes and yes, this time, I have made a horrible mistake. I'm not trying to wash away the guilt. I'll carry it with me for a long time. But Dany? This is not the Dany I know and love. This is not the Dany that left Meereen.

I don't know what happened in Vaes Dothrak, or on her way back to Meereen, but it changed her.

Or perhaps the dragon is finally woken.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello guys, I'm back with a new chapter!**

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 **I hope you like it, let me know what you think!**

* * *

"Is that an elephant?" Tyrion Lannister asks. The question startles me, causing me to look up and around, expecting to see an elephant nearby. It takes me a moment to realize that he is talking about the silver pendant in my hands.

"Oh, this?" I ask, lifting the necklace up. He nods. "Yes, it's an elephant. The only thing I had on me when I arrived at the orphanage, I was told. They lady in charge, Ashia, told me to keep it well hidden. Its my earliest memory. She knew my Master would take it from me for himself if he ever slid eyes on it. So I kept it hidden. It is the only thing I have ever owned." I explain.

"An elephant," he nods his head. "That tells you a lot about your family, doesn't it?"

"I'm sorry?" I ask in confusion.

"Elephants." He simply states.

"Volantis has a lot of elephants," I shake my head. "I know a little bit about the history of Volantis. It is quite common."

"It also has another kind of elephants." He tells me.

"The political party, I know," I nod my head. "I doubt that is connected to my necklace."

Tyrion leaned in a bit closer and squinted at the pendant. "But it very well might. The craftmanship on that pendant looks too fine for a piece that would have just been sold on the Long Bridge. Have you never even thought about it?" he asks.

"I have wondered, I'll admit," I concede. "But it changes nothing. I was raised an orphan and sold a slave. I am no elephant. I simply have one as a pendant."

I did think about it, every now and then. Sometimes, in the dead of night, if I thought hard enough, I thought I could hear the echoing laughter of little girls, and a sweet voice singing some distant song. Occasionally, in my dreams, I could make out the outline of a tall, powerful man and a beautiful woman, two people I think I was supposed to have loved, reaching out to me and calling my name. I could taste the sweetness of pomegranates, and saw glittering gold all around me. But I know my mind probably just made them up, the result of a little girl longing for a past forgotten. It was all simply too good to be true. Taken from an important family with riches, only to grow up to be a poor servant girl. It made me sound like some tragic princess from a song waiting to be rescued. It's ridiculous, and even if that strange series of events did occur, it truly changes nothing. If anything, I am in a better position now than I would have ever been in if I was raised as a Volantene noble.

I needed motherly love when I was younger. I needed kindness. I am beyond that age now. Whatever it is that I may need, I will provide it to myself. I am no longer a little girl with a lot of questions.

"What do you think we shall do next?" Tyrion asks me.

"I cannot say." I admit. If there was a time when I could accurately guess what Dany's next move might be, those days were long behind me. Power changed her, and sadly, I'm not surprised. Power changes everyone. Tyrion and I have discussed it. Of course it has changed her. I never should have expected it to be any different. She is no longer the cheerful young girl that enjoyed small talk and eating too much fruit. She is a powerful queen and Mother of dragons, someone I could never know completely.

"When do you think we will make our way to Westeros?" he asks me.

"Soon, I suppose. The Masters and the Sons of the Harpy are no longer a threat, are they?" I ask, knowing too well that after the move she made today, a long time would have to pass before they would even consider challenging her again. "What is there left for her to do here?"

"Milani, I am sorry."

"What for?"

"For making a mistake," he elaborates. "You were right and I was wrong. I should have listened to you."

"And I should have been more certain of my own view," I nod, agreeing. "There is no use in sulking about it now, my Lord. We both did what we thought was best. We both made mistakes. The only thing that we can do now is to learn from it. Or hope to learn from it, at least." I correct myself.

"Ah, but will there be a chance?" he asks in a sing-song voice. "Will our Queen ever listen to us again?"

"She will to you," I say, without a shadow of a doubt. "You are a valuable ally, Lord Tyrion. Mistakes or no mistakes. Once she steps foot in Westeros, she will need your advice. I, on the other hand… I know nothing about Westeros. I am useless to her now." Pehraps I always have been.

"You are not," he frowns. "Once she realizes who she should direct her anger toward, I will be deemed useless, not you."

"And what if no one is deemed useless?" a voice carries through the hall, causing both Tyrion and I to jump up in surprise. Dany was standing by the door, no emotions readable from her face. I don't even want to know for how long she was standing there. "What do we do then?" she asks us.

"Your Grace," Tyrion greets her, bowing his head. "Do not pay attention to our words."

"Why not?" I ask, shrugging. "I did not say anything that is not for the Queen's ears. I believe I have said the very same words to the Queen just yesterday."

"Milani, I wish to speak to you. In private."

Her voice is calm and measured. Her face displays no emotion. Knowing her, this could be the end of me. Or, she could just want to speak to me. It truly could go both ways.

"I will take my leave," Tyrion announces, standing up. "Milani. Your Grace." He gives a half nod to Dany before he walks out of the hall, closing the door behind him.

Our eyes meet in the room's tense silence.

* * *

She looks angry and I can't understand what I did to cause it.

Yesterday, she called me impulsive. She accused me of attacking her, when I did no such thing.

Milani doesn't understand, not anymore. For a very long time, she knew and understood me better than I did myself, but those days are long gone.

She could never understand the weight I carry on my shoulders, the responsibility that I now have.

She judges me for using my dragons to win the Battle of Meereen, but I did not do it to win for myself. I did it to defend my people, the people who trusted me and chose to follow me. They _chose_ me. I did not buy or trade them. They chose me on their own accord, knowing I was the best option for them.

"What can I do for you?" she speaks up, looking away from me.

"I never thought this day would come," I sigh as I start walking towards her. "I have known for a very long time that I would have to convince many people of great many things. I knew I would have to make them believe that I would treat them justly. That I am a good Queen, that I would be a good leader. I knew I would have to convince men that I am no less a ruler simply because I wear a dress. Yet, I never thought I would have to convince my closest friend of anything." I state, trying to hide the hurt aching in my chest. I watch her closely as she looks up in surprise.

"What are you convincing me of?" she asks as I take a seat right next to her.

"That I am not mad," I admit, glancing down at my hands. "I understand why you said what you said. I understand what people might think. But I am not mad, Milani."

"I never said you were," she shakes her head, a frown forming on her face. "Dany, I know you. I know you very well. You are not mad. You are not a tyrant, or a bad person. I have never said or thought that, and I am sorry if my actions made you think I did. I am simply afraid of what the Westerosi will think once you land in their kingdom. You may have been born in Westeros to a Westerosi noble house, but you have been raised in a foreign land, and have foreign councillors, save one. You really are no more Westerosi than I am Volantene. "

"Ageon the Conqueror was not born in Westeros and he was the greatest king my dynasty ever had," I argue, perhaps trying to convince myself as much as I was trying to convince her.

"Yes, and you will ride in on your dragon to conquer the Seven Kingdoms just as he did. But unlike him, you will have the legacy of a cruel and mad father that you will have to fight against. And coming in a foreign conqueror that burns their Westerosi soldiers will not help any," she says wearing that knowing expression of hers. I do not think she has ever realized how astute and wise and really is.

"Milani, you know that I would not kill, not unless I had to," I tell her, feeling anger rising in my chest. Does she truly think I would try and burn the whole land, turn it into dust and rubble? "That being said, I do realize they will not greet me in Westeros with arms wide open. I imagine all of them will start a war rather than just swear fealty. In the South I'll have to face the Lannisters and what is left of the Baratheons. And in the north, I'll have the Stark King to contend with. Not a single one of them will be willing to give up their crown, I am sure of it. And if they refuse to do it, how am I supposed to win at war if I do not use my strongest weapon?"

"Why even go there, Dany?" she asks, a pleading look on her face. "Why would you want to go through all that chaos and destruction just to rule a piece of land you do not even know? Rule here. These people adore you; they worship the ground you walk on. You have more than enough. Money, power, allies. You have it all. Why would you want to leave behind all you have built here and risk losing everything, only to watch as more men die, fighting for a lost cause?"

That is the part she will never understand. Never.

"It is not a lost cause, Milani," I shake my head. "Nor are The Seven Kingdoms a land I do not know. I was born there, the last of dynasty that forged the Iron Throne in fire and blood. I was born to sit upon it."

"Dany, you weren't," she sighs, shaking her head. I watch, shocked at her blatant denial of my claim. "You were the youngest of three. Your brother would have been the one to rule it and his son after him. Then, his son after him. If you had stayed in Westeros, if the rebellion had been crushed… you would not be a Queen, Dany. You would have been sold, like a brood mare, to some rich lord. You might be the daughter of a King and you might be the last of the Targaryens, the Mother of Dragons, but you were never born to rule."

Her words pain me more than I would like to admit.

"That isn't true, Milani."

"Yes, it is," she shakes her head, yet again. "And you are refusing to look at it from a different angle because you want to be worthy of your title. You are already worth it, Dany, but not becuase you were _born_ to rule. It is because you _earned_ the right to rule, through sacrifice, perseverance, and loyalty to your people. You do not need more. If you go to Westeros, I hope that you are aware that you might not survive that expedition. You said it yourself; they will start a war. If I must follow you into a battlefield, you know I will do that, but I do not want to see you die. I don't want to see you die, or lose what you already have just for some ridiculous birth right your delusional brother forced upon you. I have no doubt that you would make a good, capable Queen of the Seven Kingdoms, but you will have to traverse a longer and harder road than the one you have already traveled to get where you are now. And I'm afraid the path you plan to take will only lead to destruction."

"What do you suggest then?"

I watch as she fiddles her necklace between her fingers. Yet again, she is too afraid to speak her mind. After what had happened while I was away, I can't exactly blame her. But when I need honest advice, I need her to tell me the truth. I do not want a liar by my side, a flatterer. If I needed that, I would keep Daario closer. I need a friend like Milani, a friend, whose loyalty I can trust completely, who will tell me the truth, no matter how ugly it is, and keep me grounded in reality. Even if I do not wish to hear that truth. She is my anchor, and always has been. No one else knows, not even her, but I need her to make sure my worst nightmare never comes true, to keep from becoming mad like my father. "

If she does not have the courage to speak her mind, how can I ever expect an honest council from her? How can I expect her to be my anchor?

"Do not burn the damned land," she finally speaks up, looking directly in front of her and not at me. "Do not engage in war if they do not start it. Try and speak to them, try to build alliances. If you shatter that wheel that you wish to shatter, you won't have anything left to rule. You need to be ready to compromise, and give up certain things to gain others," She tells me, confusing me.

"What do you mean by that?" I ask.

"Based on what Lord Tyrion had said, the Lannister would rather die than give up the crown," she sighs. "Which leaves you with the King in the North. A King that will probably not be as willing to give up on his claim either, even if your claim is the strongest. You need to be ready for the possibility of giving up one or two of the kingdoms your family once ruled, in order to have a Westerosi ally, because you will not be able to gain and _keep_ the Iron Throne with your foreign army alone."

"If I am to rule, I do not want to rule a broken land." I warn her.

"Dany, if you refuse to bend a little, you will break, and won't rule any part of Westeros at all." she challenges me in return.

"Then I'll marry the King in the North!" I snap. I was trying so hard to hold back my anger, but I couldn't contain the dragon within me anymore. "I'll marry him and that will settle it."

"Dany, you can't base your whole plan on a marriage that might not ever happen," she tells me. "He might refuse to do so."

"And why would he?" I ask her. "I am the Queen and I have dragons. He is a King. We would rule the whole Kingdom together. He will have more power than he has now, more power than he ever could have imagined. If he is a smart man, he would not decline such an offer."

"And what about you?" she asks. "You would just marry some stranger, not caring who he was, what he has been through? Is he not a widower?"

"I am a widow as well," I remind her. It might have happened many moons ago, but I was married to Drogo. Not a day goes by without me missing him, without me wondering what could have been if I had him by my side. If I still had Drogo, I could have very well had the Iron Throne by now. "And even then, I did not know my husband. In a time of war, not many have time for romance and courting."

"Dany, if you keep looking at everything in such a way, you are going to lose yourself," she tells me, leaving me confused. I want to know more but I do not know what to ask. "Who are you, when you are not a Queen? What makes you laugh, what makes you angry? What hurts you and what makes you happy? You are a person underneath that title. You should not forget that."

Milani does not understand, nor will she ever. I am not _allowed_ to be a simple girl anymore. I do not have the selfish luxury to wonder about what I might want and need. I am a ruler, before anything else.

"Do you have so little faith in me?"

Asking such a question was difficult, more difficult than I thought it would be. After everything we have been through, it was Milani's faith in me that had never faltered. Her belief in me had never lost momentum. No matter how difficult it got, I had always known she would stand by me and would be my anchor. I am not sure of that anymore.

"I have faith in you," she assures me, shaking her head frantically. "Do not question that, not now, not ever. It is not faith… I am simply worried. I worry about whether you'll succeed going down the path you've chosen, and what will happen to you if you don't."

"Rest assured, we will never find out."

* * *

I pace around the room as I try to process what Tyrion and Dany have informed me of. I have not known Tyrion Lannister for a long time, but it would appear that he knew me very well. He left the room in a matter of seconds, leaving me alone with Dany, as if he could tell that we were about to start a conversation he did not wish to be a part of.

I had thought the burden that I carried would disappear when she returned. With Dany back, I wanted to throw away all the responsibilities I had. A part of me… doesn't want to advise her any longer.

Where is the point in it, if she refuses to listen to me? What purpose do I even serve?

Especially now, after she hadn't even bothered to inform me of her newest decision; she simply had announced it to me after she had already made it, just confirming that I am officially useless.

She allied with the Greyjoys. I would not have advised her against it, if I was asked. But I wasn't asked.

"What do you think of it?" she asks, as I am still processing the information she told me.

"Does it matter?" I shrug my shoulders, causing her to frown in confusion.

"Of course it matters."

"In which way?" I ask, shrugging again. "You have already made the alliance. You do not need me anymore, Dany. Not in your life, nor on your Small council."

"Milani, don't be ridiculous!"

"I'm not!" I snap, actually yelling at her. "I wasn't meant to wield power like you Dany! I am nobody, that was never destined to be a ruler or anyone else of great importance. I proved that quite thoroughly when you were away and I do not care to demonstrate that again! Whenever I try to say what I think, whenever I do what I promised to do for as long as I live and breathe, you ignore it. You do not listen to me, you disregard it completely. Give me one good reason why I should waste any more of my breaths on pointless words. Just one."

"Because I need you!" she yells back at me. "I cannot do it without you!"

"Yes you can!" I shout. "Yes, you can and I don't understand why you can't see it!"

"I don't want to do it without you! I need you to tell me that the alliances I make are not mistakes!"

"It's not a mistake," I sigh, not having the strength in me to shout any longer. I am empty, completely empty. I am truly nobody now, not even Daenerys's shadow now. I do not have the strength to fight her on anything. It is going to be easier for me if I simply do not disagree with her, ever. I will keep my mouth shut, nod my head and keep my opinions to myself, unless it is exactly the same as hers. "You need allies. I do not know what they have to offer, but for what you've promised them, they'd better have a lot."

"You think it was a mistake to promise them an independent kingdom?" she asks, eyebrow raised. I am glad to hear her tone is calmer now.

"That I cannot say," I tell her, holding onto my decision to not oppose her directly. Or in any other manner. But I couldn't help myself, and add, "What I do know is that just days ago, you told me that you do not wish to have half a Kingdom. If one asks, so will another. If I were you, I would not make promises lightly." Realizing I have fallen back into advising her, I stop talking, ending with a formal, "Your Grace."

"Your Grace?" she asks, looking at me in surprise. "Is that what I am now?"

"You always were, Your Grace. I simply needed a reminder."

"Milani…" she starts, trying to keep her tone level, but I can sense the tension in her voice. "Do not act like this, I beg of you."

"I am not doing anything, Your Grace. Dany. Whichever you prefer," I shrug. "What do you need me for? You mentioned you did not promise yourself to the Greyjoys, only independence. Have you promised me?" I ask, wondering if this is the explanation for everything. Is she acting this way because she knows she does need me? Am I to simply be sold and traded by her for power? Is she only saying that she wants my advice, just so that she could keep peace and then sell me, the same way her brother sold her? If that is the case, is there a reason for me to be surprised?

I had agreed to it, fair enough. But so had she.

"No," she tells me and I feel a relief going through my entire body. "Yara Greyjoy is the rightful heir, her brother said so. You will be married to a Lord, not a younger brother. If that is what you wish." She adds, as if I would have any choice in the matter if it came to it.

"As you command, Your Grace."

"Milani…"

"If I may be excused." I say, waiting for her to nod her head. She finally does and I take my leave, not looking back as I walk out of her chambers.

Out of all the rooms, out of all the people, I had not expected to find myself here.

"Milani," Tyrion greets me in surprise, jumping off of his bed. In his defense, I had not bother with knocking. I simply barged in. "Can I help you?"

"I want to get drunk," I announce, watching as a look of wonder and confusion appears on his face. "It has been a while since I last did it and I feel a great need for it now. I may not know you well, my Lord, but based on the little I do know, your habits assure me that you are the best drinking companion one could ask for."

For a moment, I think he is insulted. Then I see a smile creep onto his face.

"That I am, Milani," he chuckles, rubbing his hands together. "It is one of my two specialties. I drink and I know things."

* * *

I had missed that lightheaded feeling. I had missed not being stifled by worries and insecurities. I had missed being myself and not just someone who is in her shadow. I have been in her shadow for so long, I forgot what it was like when I am standing next to it, not in it.

I had needed this. I had needed to get absolutely and utterly drunk. With Tyrion Lannister, of all people.

"I try," I say, followed by a dramatic sigh as I slump back into the chair. "I try, all the time. And yet after all that has happened, I don't know what my purpose is anymore. What is my purpose, Tyrion?"

"You have one," he assures me, filling up his goblet. "Otherwise, you wouldn't be here."

"What, if she didn't need me, she would burn me?" I mumble.

"She would never burn you, Milani," Tyrion rolls his eyes at me. "She loves you. You are her family. She doesn't want to burn everything in front of her. She wants to burn those who fight against her."

"For now," I comment under my breath, causing Tyrion to raise an eyebrow. "Well," I shrug. I have been doing a lot of shrugging lately. "I am not that optimistic. I wish I was. You did not know her before. You do not know who she was, before she married a Khal, before her brother died. Who she is now is… she's completely different now. Some days, I do not even recognize her. And I say that as her best friend, as someone who would do anything for her. Die or kill, I would do it for her. But I am not optimistic, not anymore."

"Milani, you are drunk," Tyrion chuckles. "You have no idea what you are talking about."

"Drunk I am, but that has only lowered my inhibitions, so I can better speak the truth," I mumble, focusing on the drink in my hand and finishing it off in one gulp. "I am saying what I mean. I'm not holding back."

"No, you are drunk and unaware of your words," he persists, causing me to roll my eyes. "The Queen… the two of you are like sisters. You are like siblings and what do siblings do?" he asks, but I say nothing. "They fight," he answers in my stead. "I would know. The two of you… it was inevitable for you to butt heads at some point, seeing how long you've been together, how well you know one another. As with all siblings, you will fight for a while, spit fire on one another, if you will, but then it will be over soon. And once it is, she is going to still need you as much as you are still going to need her." he tells me.

Somewhere deep inside of me, I feel that these words should be right. They _must_ be right. He might not be an experienced military commander, but Tyrion Lannister is no fool either. He has siblings. He _hates_ his siblings. What is going on between me and her, chances are that he has been through similar situations before. I should feel touched by his words and somewhere, deep down in my heart, I am. But I am drunk on fine wine. I do not have it in me. I am no emotional drunk.

"What I need now is more wine!" I announce, smiling brightly, leaning over to grab the tankard from the table, but Tyrion snatches it right in front of my hand.

"Enough for you, Milani," he announces. "You have had one too many and I do not say that lightly."

"Oh, don't ruin my night!" I whine, sounding like a child that is about to throw a tantrum. "I need to forget!"

"Sleep!" he laughs at me. "Sleep will make you forget and the wine will only help. Besides, you need rest. I don't mean to kick you out, but it is time, Milani. Can you return to your chambers on your own?" he asks, a worried look on his face.

"Yes," I grunt as I stand up. "I'm drunk, not stupid." I say stubbornly, making him laugh.

"Very well, Milani. I bid you a good night. Whenever you are in need of a drinking companion, you know where to knock." He reminds me.

"Good night, Lord Tyrion," I mumble, stumbling as I walk away. With great effort, I somehow manage to keep my balance. As useless as it would have been, Tyrion jumps up, as if he is ready to catch me. "I'm standing. I'm standing." I reassure him. He does not sit back down, not until I close the door behind me.

I did have one too many, I'll admit to that. But I am still capable enough to conquer some stairs.

I am Milani, the closest advisor to Queen Daenerys Targaryen, the great conqueror of Slaver's Bay and future conqueror of the Seven Kingdoms. An advisor she seems to be ignoring completely, but an important advisor nonetheless. These stairs stood no chance.

It is not the stairs that stands in my way. It is my dress. Knowing I will surely trip on it again, I pull the skirt up and hold it in my hands, while taking on my great adversary, step by step.

When I reach the top of the staircase, I start laughing.

See, Dany? I don't need you to hold my hand! I can do it on my own, even when you are not next to me! I am not your shadow! I _am_ someone! I am Milani, the conqueror of stairs and breaker of long dresses!

"I'm someone!" I laugh, leaning against the wall.

"Milani?" I hear a surprised voice asked. I look up into the worried eyes of Daario Naharis.

"Oh. You again." I mumble. I may be drunk, but I remember that he was the one who started this whole mess. If he hadn't kiss me, I never would have confronted Dany to begin with. Then again, if she had not told him to do so, he never would have kissed me. "Go away, Daario."

"Milani, are you drunk?" he asks, his voice laced with surprise.

"Yes!" I smile proudly at him. "And I haven't felt better in weeks!"

"I can see that," he nods his head, narrowing his eyes. "How much did you have?"

"Some might say too much, some would say not enough," I giggle, laughing at my own joke. "Go away, Daario. Find some other poor soul to bother." I say, hoping my exit will be as dramatic as I wanted it to be. And dramatic it is; I stumble over my own two feet, Daario grabbing me by the hands to keep me standing.

"You can't even stand," he shakes his head. "Alright, I'm taking you to your room."

"Oh no!" I gasp. "You are not going anywhere with me."

"I am not asking," he sighs, as he puts a hand around my waist and starts walking, carrying most of my weight for me. "You can't handle your liquor, it seems." He comments. At least he is not carrying me in his arms. That would be awkward, although I think he is strong enough to do so.

"Were your arms always this strong?" I ask, focused on the arm gripping my waste.

"Yes," he chuckles, laughing at my drunken personality. "Don't take this the wrong way, Milani, but I prefer you when you are drunk." He has a nice laugh. And a handsome face.

"How come?" I ask in confusion.

"You do not threaten me, for a start," he laughs, pulling me up as I started to stumble again. "You are more… approachable."

"Approachable." I let out the most unladylike snort. "I'm always approachable Daario, if one knows how to approach me. It just so happens that you don't know how to do it."

"Well, that is a first."

"I'm sure it is."

"Our Queen might be a Dragon, but you are the one that spits fire."

I burst out laughing, unable to control myself.

"Daario, stop it," I laugh. "I'm too drunk; I'm laughing at every word that comes out of your mouth."

"I should seize the opportunity then," he smirks at me, stopping in place. "Here we go, Milani. You are safely delivered to your chambers."

"I am."

"Good night, Milani," he tells me, staring down into my eyes. I had never noticed how hypnotic those eyes really are. I know it's probably just the alcohol, but Dany's offer doesn't seem so distasteful now. "Drink some water if you want to avoid pain in the morning." He advises me.

I know I am making a mistake. I know it. But I can't stop myself.

I don't know why, but… I can't stop myself.

As he turns around, I grab him by the hand and pull him towards me. As his body collides with mine, I kiss him, directly on the lips. He doesn't stop me. In fact, he leans even more towards me.

And I keep kissing him as I struggle to find the door handle behind my back. I finally find it and I pull us into the chambers, slamming the door shut.

All the while, Daario says nothing and his lips never leave mine.


	6. Chapter 6

**Here we go guys, new chapter is UP!**

 **Don't forget to let me know what you think! As promised, things are going to heat up a little bit in the next few chapters. Westerosi drama is speeding up and soon enough, we'll be on a ship to Dragonstone, which is when the real drama starts.**

 **So, tell me what you think. Favorite, follow, review. Pretty please? :)**

* * *

The excruciatingly bright sunlight shines through my eyelids, forcing me to wake.

But I can't bring myself to open my eyes. Knowing what awaits me when I do, I can't do it.

My head feels as if someone has taken a giant hammer and driven a sharp nail straight through the middle skull, and pounded it in for hours, just for good measure. If I could, I would take my head off and be done with it.

As I try my best to ignore the throbbing in my head, memories of the night before start flooding back into my mind. I remember the amount of wine I drank. Actually, I can't remember the _exact_ amount of wine, which can only mean bad things. I remember that I spoke to Tyrion, perhaps saying too much; I can't remember what. My eyes snap open when I remember Daario.

And there he is, right next to me, in my own bed. As I watch in horror, his chest rises up and down, showing that he truly is sound asleep and not pretending. My vision starts spinning and I'm afraid it is not because of last night's wine.

I was drunk, but not _that_ drunk. I knew what I was doing. As soon as I remember, I know it. I remember it. I was aware of my movements, my decisions. I was just too drunk to care or think properly.

And I will pay for it. I will pay for it with my life.

I was so angry at Dany when she suggested I sleep with Daario and I did not hold back my anger. I barely spoke to her for days and I kept on thinking about it for _weeks!_ And what will I do now? As soon as she turned her back on me, I did exactly what she suggested, after attacking her for doing so! What was I thinking?! Did I not realize what problems I would cause?! No, I knew it. I just didn't care. I left the worry for this morning.

"Daario," I mumble, shaking him by the shoulder. I don't want to touch him, I don't even want to look at him, but I have to get him out of my bed as soon as possible. "Daario, wake up," I repeat a bit louder, shaking him with more force than before. His breathing changes, if only for a second, before he continues to quietly snore. "Darrio!" I snap, finally managing to wake him up; he jumps up in surprise, looking around for possible danger or an imposter. When he realizes it is just me, he closes his eyes.

"Why would you yell like that?" he grunts in a raspy voice.

"You need to leave. Now!" I growl, in case my intentions weren't clear. He doesn't have a choice now.

"Why?" he asks, opening his eyes again. "Are you ashamed of me?"

"Daario, I beg of you, don't," I shake my head. "Leave me be. I want to be alone."

"Ah, so you are ashamed of me?" he asks, and I can notice a trace of hurt behind his voice.

"Daario," I warn him. "Please."

"Worry not, Milani," he sighs, stretching his arms over his head. "Nothing happened."

"Don't lie to me to protect my virtue, Daario." I snap at him.

"I'm not lying," he tells me, raising his eyebrows. "Milani, you had more wine in you than blood. I know you do not think of me as an honorable man, but I am no rapist."

"Daario, I remember."

"We kissed, Milani," he shakes his head. "I didn't take away your maidenhood. We kissed and touched, but nothing else happened. I am no rapist." He repeats.

"Then why did you sleep in my bed?" I ask, still not allowing the relief to take me over. I thought I was ruined, ruined by my own stupidity. I have always stayed away from men, it is my own choice. Besides, Dany needed a maiden to offer as a wife, not a whore. I could have lost it all, all in one night of stupidity. Letting Daario into my bed would have been a crucial mistake. It still is a mistake, very much so, but at least I did not give everything away. Now, as common sense is returning to me, I realize that I would probably _know_ if Daario bedded me. I remember how difficult it was for Dany to ride a horse after her wedding night. She could barely walk, let alone ride a horse. I would have felt something. And I do not feel it.

"You wanted me to stay," he shrugs as he gets out of the bed. "You can deny it as much as your heart desires, Milani. You wanted me to stay. You are lucky I am more respectable than you thought. Any other man would have jumped at the opportunity to make you his."

"Am I supposed to thank you for not taking advantage of me?" I ask bitterly.

"Seeing as you are the one that dragged me into your chambers, possibly, yes."

"Why did you follow me in?" I ask, noticing his face changing. "I am not trying to put the blame on you!" I protest, having a pretty good idea of what he was about to say. When he closes his mouth and stays silent, I know I was right. "I am the one to blame, do not think I am blaming you. I am the one who initiated it. But why did you follow my lead?"

"Because I am a man," he tells me, looking directly into my eyes. "I am a man and you are a gorgeous woman. I would have been a fool to refuse."

"But you love Dany," I utter, shaking my head. "She is your lover."

She is more than his lover. He is _her_ lover, not the other way around. I have seen the way he looks at her, and has looked at her ever since they first met. It is a look of love, a look of utter and complete devotion. He has risked his life for her, countless times. If that was not driven by love, then what was?"

"I do," he confirms, nodding his head. "But she does not love me."

I want to defend her and deny it, but Daario is speaking the truth. I doubt she ever kept it a secret. I know that Daario is very dear to her and that she truly cares for him, but it is not love. Just as I have noticed the way Daario looks at her, I have noticed the way she looks at him. She does not look at him the same way she looked at her husband. She truly loved Drogo, with all her heart. As much as she cares for Daario, she does not love him and I cannot just lie to his face and claim that she does.

"Women are not the only ones that want to feel loved, Milani," he tells me. "It will serve you well to remember that. Sometimes, sharing a bed is not enough."

"But I do not love you either." I mumble.

He knows that. I pushed him away when he kissed me! I am not in love with him. I am not sure if I am even attracted to him! He is good looking; I see no shame in admitting that. He can be quite charming when he wants to, but he is not the only man in the world that has charm. He doesn't seem particularly gentle or kind, although I believe he has a good heart. But all of those things do not add up to love. If he thought I felt something towards him, he was greatly mistaken.

"I know," he smiles down at me. "But you also have a warmer heart than our Queen."

I have never considered Dany to be cold-hearted, no more than I considered myself to be a particularly warm or meek. I know how to stand up for myself. I am not a perfect little flower Daario's words paint me to be. And Dany is not a monster, or a cold hearted snake. Although… I do not stand up for myself when it comes to her. I never had to do it before and now that it is needed of me, I do not know how to do it. I am so used to being below her, I do not know how to be her equal. Not in life, of course not. She is a Queen and I am a simple girl. But when the doors are closed and she is no longer a Queen, we should be equals, at least in our conversations. And we are not.

"That does not make me a better person than she is." I mumble, looking at the ground.

"I never said you were a perfect, divine creature," Daario shakes his head and smiles sadly. "Nor did I say that she was an evil beast. But you do have a good heart, Milani. So does she, I know that, but… power changes people. She cannot have power and a good heart at the same time."

"Yes, she can." I protest.

"This? You defending her, even after the terrible fights you two have had?" he asks, raising an eyebrow at me. "This shows your heart in all its glory." He tells me, his mouth curving up into a knowing grin. As much as I want to accept the compliment, I focus more on the other things he said. Is it possible that Dany has told him of our disagreements? And if she has, why does it bother me? She is a Queen, she can do what she damn well pleases!

Jealousy. It is as simple as that. Daario is her ear now, not me.

"I need to be alone," I mumble, unable to continue such a conversation. I need to be alone and I need to think of what I will do next. As Daario opens the door, I realize I shouldn't leave things like this. "Daario?" I call for him and watch as he turns my way. "Thank you."

"What for?"

"For not taking what you could," I utter in a low voice. "I would have been ruined. Thank you, for having some sense when I lost all of mine. I will never forget that."

He stares at me for a moment before simply nodding his head and closing the door behind him as he leaves me alone to drown in my thoughts.

I meant what I said. He could have taken advantage of me, easily. I all but spread my legs for him, and seeing how much wine I consumed the night before, perhaps I have even done that. He did not take advantage of me and I will never forget that. My opinion of him is certainly better than it was before.

Unfortunately, my relationship with Daario is the least of my worries.

I have to tell her. I cannot go around it. If she was to find out from someone else, it would be the end of me. I doubt Daario will go and offer her the information, not after the talk we've just had, but I can't risk it. For all I know, someone could have seen us, or saw him leaving my chambers. I can't let this reach Dany from any mouth other than my own.

Not just for my own safety. I honestly do not want to lie to her. She deserves better than that. I am better than that. I will face my own stupidity and the consequences it might carry.

And this is merely a drop in an overflowing river. Daenerys and I are not as close as we were before. I do not like the direction in which our friendship is going. I must salvage whatever is left, if there is anything left to salvage. And the best way for me to do that is to be completely honest with her.

I do not bother with changing my clothes; I am still wearing the dress I was wearing yesterday. I only take the time to run a brush through my tangled hair. As soon as I look presentable enough, I go to see her.

My hands are shaking as I knock on her door; nails dig into my palm.

"Come in."

As I walk in, I find her sitting on the bed, still covered in sheets. I managed to wake her up.

"Did I wake you up? I am sorry, Your Grace." I bow my head in apology.

"No, it's alright," she sighs, leaning on the headboard. "What happened? You look troubled." she frowns in concern.

"I need to talk to you."

I can see her narrowing her eyes at me, trying to read my facial expressions. Whatever she sees, I can tell she doesn't like it; suddenly, she seems wide awake.

"What is it?"

"I… I have made a mistake," I mutter. The look on her face tells me that she needs me to elaborate. I feel so ashamed and nervous I can barely find the words. "Last night, I had a bit too much to drink. Actually, more than a bit."

"Are you feeling unwell?" she asks with a worried look. "Do you want me to call for a healer?"

And here I thought I couldn't possibly feel more guilt.

"No, there is no need for that. Thank you," I add, not wanting to sound too rude. I take a deep breath, trying to prepare myself. "I have to tell you something and the only thing I ask for is for you to not interrupt me. Please, let me finish. And then… you can do as you please."

"Alright," she agrees, after an excruciatingly long silence. "Now, what is it?"

"I had too much to drink, but not enough to entirely take leave of my senses," I whisper, looking down at the stone floor under me. "I couldn't walk properly. Daario caught me as I was about to fall and he helped me to my chambers. I could barely stand, but I knew what I was doing, I knew very well. I simply acted on an impulse. I kissed Daario and when he did not stop me, I took him into my chambers," I sigh, finally looking up at her. I can't see any emotions on her face. Nothing. She looks at me the same way she did before I started talking. If she is feeling anything, she is not showing it. At least she is allowing me to talk without interruption. "We only kissed. Nothing else happened. He did spend the night in my bed, but we did not… After everything that I have told you when you suggested it, after my disgust… I can only say that I am sorry and ask for your forgiveness. I have never asked for much, Dany. And I am not trying to use it as an excuse. Nothing I do now can erase the fact that I did you wrong. The only thing that I can ask is for your forgiveness. And I can only hope that I will have a chance to prove my loyalty to you."

It feels liberating. I still feel guilt more than anything, but I also feel relief. I said all that I had to say and now, it is in her hands. And whatever she decides to do… at least I got it off of my chest.

I didn't dare and imagine what she would say to me. A part of me hoped for forgiveness but another part of me was expecting to be accused for treason. I would willingly accept either. I know which one I want, but I will accept either. I can only hope that she speaks up soon, whatever her decision might be. The silence is killing me.

"I will need you tonight," she finally speaks up. I look at her, wide-eyed. "Yara and Theon Greyjoy will be joining me for supper and I would like for you to be there. I am interested in what you think of them."

I blink, rapidly, thinking that I might have lost for a moment.

"Dany… what? What do you…?" I start, but I can't form a coherent sentence.

"I prefer if we are to pretend as if it never happened," she tells me, taking a deep breath. "I am not angry with you, Milani. It was a moment of weakness that never would have happened had I not thrown Daario your way. I only had good intentions. And if he managed to stifle the loneliness for one night, I am glad. I do not love him, Milani. I love _you_. You are my family and I _need_ you," she tells me. The more she speaks, the faster the tears fill up my eyes. "I am tired of this, whatever this is. I need my best friend, no, my sister, back. I don't care what happens or what you do. I need you by my side."

"Dany, I am so sorry." I sob, unable to control myself any longer.

"Don't be," she shakes her head, looking alarmed. "I do not love him."

"Not about that," I shake my head. "Well, not only about that. I am sorry for everything. I have not been a good friend lately. And I am sorry for that. I am so sorry."

I lose the little control I had and I break down in tears. Ashamed, I cover my face with my hands and then away. Moments later, I feel Dany's arms around me and I fall apart. I try to slip from her grasp, falling down on the floor but she kneels by my side. She doesn't let go of me and she lets me cry on her shoulder.

"You are my sister," I hear her say as she comforts me. "Everything else falls short. Daario means nothing and you are my family. I need you by my side when I take the Seven Kingdoms, Milani. I am not going to let some stupid moment of weakness take that away. You made a mistake, and so did I. I have made plenty. Now is the time for us to leave that behind and move forward, side by side, the way it should always be. We are in this together. That is all that matters."

* * *

I push away the goblet of wine sitting in front of me. I cannot even look at it. Instead, I take a sip of water, only prolonging the uncomfortable silence at the table.

Theon Greyjoy looks like a man who has aged before his time. He is quiet and seems almost invisible as he stares down at his plate, only nibbling at his foods every now and then. I did not notice him making eye contact with anyone other than his sister. He did not look at me or even look at Dany.

I can hardly believe that that shadow of a man shares blood with Yara Greyjoy. Yara is everything he is not. She looks as tough as any warrior I have ever seen. She carries the same strength within her, the same strength I have seen in Ser Jorah and Ser Barristan. She does not stay quiet, nor does she shy away from making eye contact. When I speak, she looks right at me and when Dany speaks to her, she replies with confidence. Their similar appearances aside, I never would have guessed they were related based off their temperaments.

I feel uncomfortable throughout the whole meal. I am still recovering from earlier events, both from hangover I got from drinking binge the night before and from the emotional, heavy conversation I had with Daenerys. It ended well for me, but it does not mean that I have completely gotten over the ordeal.

It is still not over. Dany might have forgiven me, but I still have to forgive myself. What I did earlier has to be the lowest moment of my life. Even if I will not face any repercussions for it, even if she does not hold it against me, I need to learn to not hold it against myself. Knowing myself, harboring all the insecurities that I do, I can only imagine that it will take time.

I will deal with it at night, when the doors are closed and no one can see me. I will deal with it in my own private time and I will not allow myself to let it cloud my judgment and harm my other duties. Dany needs an advisor. She needs her family. She needs me. And even if she doesn't really need me, she wants me here. She wants me by her side. I need to be at my best and I need to learn fast. The mistakes I made while she was away, I refuse to make again. I will learn from them. If that means I will be a little less Milani and a little more a Queen's advisor, so be it. I can be her voice of reason all the same.

"Lady Milani, you are from Volantis?" Yara asks me.

"Milani, my lady," I correct her with a small smile. "Yes, I am. I was born there but I grew up on the road. Pentos, mostly." I explain. Adding more details to it would have only complicated things.

"You have never been to Westeros?" she asks, tilting her head on interest.

"No, my lady," I shake my head. "Wherever Her Grace went, I followed."

"People from Essos seem to think of Westeros as a wild land," Yara chuckles as she fills up her goblet. "In fairness to them, Essos might be a bit more… refined. But we are hardly barbaric."

"Was it not common in the Iron Islands to rape and reave?" Dany asks. She is right. It _was_ common. She only agreed to an alliance with the Greyjoys after Yara promised that the Ironborn would forget their old ways and adapt to the new ones. Dany demanding such a promise does not surprise. She is the Queen that managed to abolish slavery throughout Essos. She would never allow any subject of hers, no matter the kingdom, act in such a way.

"It was the way we were raised, Your Grace," Yara tells her in a measured tone; she was disagreeing but at least did so tactfully. "You cannot hold our customs against us, not when we have agreed to change them for the sake of our alliance. What is in the past is in the past."

"Well, I think all of us seated here will find that one should not be held accountable for their ancestor's sins," Dany speaks up. "My father was the Mad King. Generations of Ironborn have raped and reaved over the millennia. And Milani here comes from a Free City that has the highest population of slaves in all of Essos," she tells us. I wish I could deny that, but I cannot. I suppose that I should count of myself lucky to have not been raised in Volantis and indoctrinated into the slave culture. That way, it is simply a city I was born in. Nothing more, nothing less. "So long as our ways are different, which they are, we have nothing to fear."

"Well, I think we should drink to that," Yara grins, lifting her goblet up. "To children being better than those who brought them into this world." She offers and we all clink our goblets together, all four of us, leaning across the table. "Milani, are you drinking water?" Yara asks in surprise, noticing the clear liquid.

"Yes," I force a smile. "Wine and I don't always get along well."

"If that is the case, I'm afraid you will find Westeros quite dull." she laughs.

"My Lady, I am sure I will find other ways to keep myself occupied," I smile, knowing very well that I will not have time for dancing and drinking when that dark hour comes. I might be mistaken, but I am afraid that the days of joy and laughter have long since left us. Most of my life, I did find life in Essos fun and enjoyable, but the day Dany had married Khal Drogo, our lives have changed. A new chapter began and our carefree days of child hood fell behind. I doubt I will be able to remember them by the time we step foot in Westeros. "My lord, are we dull?" I ask Theon Greyjoy, unable to take his somber demeanor any longer. "If we are, I am sorry. What would you like to speak about?" I ask, hoping I am helping the man. After all, he is sitting with three women; his sister, a Queen and a servant girl that climbed the ladder to become the Queen's adviser. We are not talking about hairstyles and dresses, but he still appears to be bored out of his mind.

"No, no, My Lady," Theon Greyjoy jumps up in surprise, finally looking at me; a look that showed me that this was he felt maybe more uncomfortable than I did. "Please, carry on."

Dany interrupts, asking Yara a question about the lands of Westeros, but I keep my eyes on the man.

I can't explain it. I can't point it out, I don't know what it is, but there is something about him that makes me feel uneasy. I don't think he isn't trustworthy, it isn't that. I do not think he lacks intelligence, or capability. I simply can't read him. But I know someone who assuredly can.

"My Lady, my Lord, Your Grace," I speak up, drawing attention to myself. "If I may be excused, I would like to retire for tonight. I am afraid my over indulgence of wine is catching up to me.

"Of course, Milani," Dany smiles at me. "If you need a healer, do not hesitate to call for one." she adds.

"It is nothing a good night sleep cannot solve," I reassure her, before turning my head to nod at the Greyjoys. "I bid you all a good night." I say. After they nod in my direction, I turn around and I leave the hall, hearing Dany ask Yara another question. Unlike last night, I did not question my sense of direction or where I am going. I know exactly whom have to talk to and why.

"Milani?" Tyrion asks in surprise when he opens the door to his chambers, only to find me on the other side. "Has supper ended already?" he asked. Dany invited him to join us as well, but for whatever reason, he declined. Dany did not offer a reason for it and I did not ask her.

"No, I just left early," I explain. "Do you have a moment, my Lord? I wish to speak to you."

"Of course," he tells me, stepping aside to let me into his chamber. "Would you care for some wine?"

"Definitely not," I reply at once, making the man laugh in response. "I will not be drinking wine for a while, I'm afraid."

"Was it an eventful night after you left?" he asks.

"You could call it that." I shrug.

"What do you wish to talk about, Milani?" he asks as he sits down, a table between the two of us. For a moment, I think that I should keep my mouth shut and ignore the feeling of uneasiness I have been feeling, but as soon as I consider that option, I decide to go through with it nonetheless.

"Theon Greyjoy."

"What about him?" Tyrion asks and I can see it clearly on his face that he did not see Theon Greyjoy as a possible topic of conversation. Not now, possibly not ever.

"I cannot say," I furrow my brow in thought, looking down at my hands. "I can't quite explain it. Something just… doesn't feel right about him. I don't know what. It could all just be a product of my imagination, but he… I don't know what to think of him."

"Milani, it is not a product of your imagination, I am afraid," Tyrion says. I look up at him in surprise; he has a frown on his face. "I am doing my best not to judge a man based on the mistakes he had made in the past. I certainly don't want to be judged on my previous mistakes, that's why I try. I try to give people another chance. I can't quite read Theon Greyjoy either. Whatever has happened to him, he is not the same cocky bastard he was before. I can tell you that much, he is not the same. He cannot look at me without looking away within seconds. The Theon Greyjoy I once knew ridiculed me for being a dwarf. He had no problem with disrespecting me then and he is not disrespecting me now."

"Perhaps it is because you have a Dragon Queen to advise?" I tease, smiling at him.

"Perhaps," he admits, nodding his head. "But still, it is not the same cocky boy I met all that time ago in Winterfell."

"Winterfell?" I ask in surprise. "Is Winterfell not the capital of the North?" I ask. My knowledge about Westeros is not extensive, but I know the basic geography at least. King's Landing is the capital of the Seven Kingdoms, where Dany's family first landed centuries ago. Sunspear is the capital of Dorne, Dragonstone is the ancestral seat of House Targaryen and Winterfell is in the North, not the Iron Islands. Perhaps I was mistaken though.

"It is," Tyrion confirms with a small smile. "And that is a whole different story, Milani. A long one, at that." He adds.

"And I believe that I need to hear it. Do you not agree?" I ask, with Tyrion not responding. "I have time."

I watch as Tyrion starts giggling. Alarmed at seeing a man grown giggle like a child, I raise my eyebrows.

"Am I missing something?" I wonder.

"You like me." he responds.

"I beg your pardon?" I mumble in surprise.

"You like me now," he repeats, smiling at me. "You want to hear my opinion, not because I know many things, including what Theon Greyjoy did before joining our cause, but because you truly want to hear my opinion, and dare I say, enjoy my company. After that icy reception I received from you before, you have finally grown to like me. Or am I mistaken?" he asks. I had forgotten just how self-centered Tyrion Lannister can be.

"If you keep talking like that, I give you more of that 'icy reception'," I grumble in warning, but I do not manage to erase the smile from Tyrion's face. He is beaming, as if he has won a battle. Knowing how stubborn I can get, it almost is as if he has won a battle. "We have bonded over common defeat and with wine, Lord Tyrion. I trust you. You have proven yourself loyal to Dany. That is enough for me. Besides, you are the only one around who knows what Theon Greyjoy used to be like."

"Why are you so interested in his past?" he asks.

"Because you cannot judge or read a man if you do not know of his past sins and deeds." I elaborate. "Dany trusts him and so do you. I trust both of you, her judgment and yours. But I want to know what he did before, Tyrion. Who he was before all of this. If I am to make the decision of whether or not I should judge him on his previous mistakes, I will need to know what those mistakes are. Don't you agree?" I ask. Tyrion does not respond. Instead, he fills his goblet and I know. He is ready to talk.


	7. Chapter 7

**Here we go guys, here's another one. But before we start, a few things.**

 **I want to hear what you think, how should they be paired. We have Dany, Milani, Jon and Robb. At first I thought I knew, but then I lost it and now I'm just… not sure. So I'd like to know what you think. Review or PM me if you want to tell me :)**

 **Two, I have a new story out! Yup. What if Rhaenys escaped on time? It's going to be Jon/OC, with Jon NOT being a Targaryen. He's also not Ned's son, even if he was raised as his bastard. Wait, who's his dad then? You'll have to read and see! "The Lost One", please, check it out! :)**

 **And also, thank you for all of your reviews, even for those that haven't been the kindest. But, fair question: If you don't like it, why do you keep reading it? But, you know, to each his own. Thank you all the same! :)**

 **Well, that's it from me! We're over 150 followers and I have confetti on standby :D See you soon in the next chapter, or in one of my other stories. You know the drill if you like it: follow, favorite, review. It means a lot. Like, a review is as good as a golden retriever puppy in a basket. It really is! :)**

* * *

I should have learned to trust my instincts by now.

Knowing what Theon Greyjoy did in the past does not give me the ability to know what he might do in the future. People say, once a traitor, always a traitor. On the other hand, people also believe in giving second chances. I know I do. But too much is at stake for it to be as simple as that.

The little reassurance I have comes from the fact that there also must be too much at stake for him as well. The promises he had made and broke in the past… well, he did not make them to Queen Daenerys.

I decided not to share my worries with Dany for two reasons. For one, I do not want to burden with worries that might be entirely baseless. I have no proof that Theon Greyjoy has plans to betray her. And like Tyrion told me the night before, he does not seem like the same man he was before. Years have passed, and I know all to well how time can change people. War has happened. I may not be a skilled warrior, but I also know that war can change people too.

I will keep a close eye on him, for as long as I can. I will make it my own, personal assignment. If he says or does anything that would make me doubt his word, then I will go to Dany at once.

"Milani, is that frown on your face perpetual or am I imagining things?" Tyrion asks me. He starts laughing when my eyes narrow. I liked him better when he thought I hated him. Now, he feels comfortable enough to tease me.

"Perpetual, I am afraid," I admit, not having the strength to play this game with him. "The day of our departure… it grows closer. The thought of it worries me."

"Why?" he asks, shrugging his shoulders. "With the Unsullied, Dothraki and the Greyjoy ships, we have a strong army. Besides, Lord Varys will bring us more allies. You should not forget about that."

How could I? Dany already has people working for her cause in Westeros, even now, when our journey to Westeros is yet to be planned. According to Tyrion, Dorne might be a valuable ally. They have a good army, or so he says. They have a desire for vengeance against the current royal family. At this point, I can only wonder if there is a house in Westeros that is not in search of vengeance.

I do not understand revenge, not truly. I have never felt the need for it. No one has ever done me wrong in such a way. I understand why people are driven by revenge. It is the feeling of revenge itself that is unknown for me. What act could be so wretched or grievous to make you want to have the blood of another on your hands? Murder? Betrayal? Or something trivial?

"And your sister and your nephew will not have an army at the ready when we arrive?" I ask, sighing as I already know the answer to that. "People will die, a lot of them. It is not such an easy thing to accept."

"It is war, Milani, death is inevitable. We can only do our best to ensure we spare as many as possible."

"I know," I nod my head, sighing heavily. "I know it cannot be avoided. I may not be the brightest person you have ever met, my lord, but I am not that stupid."

"I never thought you were stupid," he shakes his head. "But why are you so troubled when we have so many things in our favor?"

"Because I am not sure if we should trust our allies so readily," I tell him, turning around as I start pacing around the balcony. "How are we supposed to know that the Greyjoys will not stab us in the back the first chance they get? And what about the other Westerosi lords? Why on Earth would they choose to trust a foreign, unfamiliar conqueror and daughter of the Mad King over the woman who has reigned over them for 20 year? We can promise them gold and lands and yes, they will get it once Dany takes her place as the rightful Queen, but will your family not offer the same?" I ask.

"Cersei no doubt will," Tyrion confirms. "She will shower them with more gold then we might ever hope to give. But she has also offended many people, Milani. My family has blood on their hands. Whatever is left of the Baratheons when we arrive, they will never ally to my family again. Dorne still hates my family for killing their princess and prince. The King in the North? They killed his father and imprisoned his sister, before forcing her to marry me. Some might join my family, that is true. But our Queen has no blood on her hands."

"And for how long will that be the case?"

"Knowing our Queen, for as long as she possibly can." He tells me.

I know that Dany doesn't want to kill and burn everything in front of her, but I don't know for how long she can avoid it. I know her. If she has no other choice, she will do it. And I do not think that would be a smart move, but how can she not use her strongest weapon? If it comes down to battles, and I know it most likely will, how can anyone expect her not to use dragons against her enemies? I would too, if I were in her place. But that will not gain her any allies or favor. And unfortunately, for her to become a successful ruler she will need to gain the people's favor and at least some allies among the nobility. It is trivial, stupid even, but it does fall down to that. If you treat your people kindly, and with just the right amount of fear, they will love and respect you. And I am afraid that dragons will only inspire fear and deter love.

Dany just isn't experienced enough. Her advisers aren't experienced enough. I have no idea what I am doing. Tyrion Lannister might know our enemy, but he has never fought them in combat. Grey Worm has never led an attack against a Westerosi army. Missandei… Well, she might be the only one who knows enough to solidify her position as her adviser and translator. The rest of us our out of our depth, Dany included.

"I keep thinking that the time is not right," I admit, looking away from Tyrion's all-knowing gaze. "I think that perhaps we still need to wait for something else to happen. I don't know exactly what, but... We haven't learned enough. We don't have enough. It just… I can't escape the feeling that we are not prepared for the task ahead of us."

"You might just be right, Milani," Tyrion agrees in serious tone. He wears a solemn frown as he looks into the distance, to the land of Meereen beneath the Pyramyd we are in. "But we will never be sure of that, not unless we make a move."

"So, going in blind? That sounds like a good plan to you?" I ask him in disbelief.

"We may never find a better opportunity to strike, even if we are blind."

"I don't understand how-" I start, but I stop speaking when Missandei walks out, joining us on the balcony. Nothing that we were discussing is a secret, at least not one kept from Missandei, but I about to go on an angry tirade against Tyrion. The least I can do is to not lecture him in front of others.

"Pardon the intrusion, but a raven came with a letter addressed to you, my Lord," Missandei tells us as she hands Tyrion the letter; as he opens it and reads it, Missandei and I have a silent conversation. She gives me a questioning look, clearly picking up on the animosity I was showing our Queen's adviser. I shake my head slowly, as a signal that I will tell her about it later. After all, between the Queen's Small Council, there should be no secrets. At least that is what I believe.

"Gods be good!" Tyrion gasps in surprise, drawing attention to himself.

"My lord, what is it?" Missandei jumps.

"Is it from Westeros?" I ask, already imagining the worst things that could possibly happen. The Lannisters have defeated the Northerners? The Northerners have announced their intention to fight and kill the Dragon Queen? I even entertain the ridiculous notion that some unknown magical force has attacked and wiped them all from the face of the Earth.

"The Great Sept of Baelor burned to the ground in a wildfire explosion." He utters, eyes wide in horror.

"Great Sept?" I ask, confused. If it was some city in Westeros of great importance, I believe I would have heard of the name before. It sounded very strange to me.

"Wildfire?" Missandei asks, looking as confused as I felt. Tyrion gives her a look and then he looks at me, seemingly annoyed with our lack of knowledge before remembering that we were not raised in his homeland.

"A sept is a place where people who believe in the Seven pray," he tells us, staring down at the letter in his hands. "The Great Sept of Baelor is the largest sept in Westeros, the seat of the High Septon of the Faith. It is the largest building in King's Landing. Well, it _was_ the largest building in King's Landing." He adds, realizing that this great edifice no longer exists.

"What is wildfire then?" I ask.

"Wildfire is a substance," he sighs, still not moving his eyes away from the letter. "The name says it all. It is very much wild fire, an uncontrollable fire. Extremely flammable. Cannot be extinguished with water. You might be lucky if you have a lot of sand on hand, but otherwise… It consumes everything. I have seen it. I have used it. Wildfire that kept Stannis Baratheon away from King's Landing, but it almost killed us all." he tells us.

"Who would use it again, if it is so dangerous?" I ask. If it cannot be controlled, who would risk such a weapon? Dragon's fire is very dangerous, but Dany at least has some sort of control over it. Judging by Tyrion's words, if one uses wildfire, they simply light it up and pray to their Seven Gods that they will not be harmed as well. Who would be mad enough to use it again?

"The Queens father used it quite frequently. It was his execution method of choice. King Aerys planned on using it during Robert's Rebellion," Tyrion shakes his head, looking frightened at the mere thought of it. "He was stopped, thank the Gods. And the wildfire was taken away."

"Tyrion, who used it?" I ask again, sounding angrier; I did not even call him by his title.

"According to Lord Varys, my sister."

"Why would she burn her own city?" I ask him.

I can understand using it against an enemy. It sounds very dangerous, just as it seems powerful. I could justify that, no matter how brutal it is. But using it agasomstagainst your own people? After hearing Tyrion described it, I doubt such a fire could not have casualties. Why would anyone do such a thing?

"She didn't want to destroy the Sept, Milani. She wanted to destroy those in it."

"Who was in it, my Lord?" Missandei asks him.

"According to Lord Varys, Queen Margaery, her brother Loras Tyrell, their father, Mace Tyrell, my uncle, Kevan and a number of citizens of King's Landing. Big number." He adds.

"Did she kill all of the Tyrells?" I ask. Not only did she not use it against her enemies, but she used it against her allies. Margaery Tyrell was married to her son, her only surviving child.

"Lady Olenna seems to be alive, but if she is the only one, House Tyrell dies with her," Tyrion mumbles, finally looking up at me and Missandei. "She killed them all. My nephew too."

"Was he in the Sept?"

"If what Lord Varys writes is true, he killed himself after seeing what had happened."

"I am sorry for your loss." I mumble in a low voice, watching as Tyrion bows his head. He might be fighting on a different side now, but they were still his family. Especially the children. I heard him say the same, when he talked about his niece, who was supposedly murdered. Those innocents were not the ones to blame. They did not have a say in anything, whether they were wearing a crown on their head or not.

It must be horrible, causing your child's death, however indirect it might have been. I have heard from her brother that she truly is evil, but this is making me see Cersei Lannister in a different light. Evil is easy. Evil is easy to read, easy to understand. You can learn how to judge its next move, you can know what to expect. What she did? It is insane. Mad, cruel. In order to understand _that,_ you would have to be equally deranged.

"He was a child," Tyrion shakes his head, and I can see traces of grief on his face. "A child of 16, who had no business having a crown on his head."

"My lord, forgive me if I am asking this too soon, but… Who will sit on the Iron Throne now? Robert Baratheon has no more successors, whether they are his children or not. Will there be a vacant seat?" I ask. I felt bad for asking this as he was clearly still accepting the death of his nephew, but it needed to be asked. I cannot think as his… friend. I suppose that is what I am now. I cannot think as his friend when I have to think as Dany's friend. I need to think of her cause, her ultimate goal, which is that very throne in question. If we are leading a war, we will have no time for grief, however horrible that sounds. We need to know who exactly Dany will fight to take the iron throne from.

"Milani, if you believe that seat will be vacant for more than a fortnight, you haven't been paying attention."

* * *

"I don't understand!" Dany protests, looking fairly angry. "How can people still follow someone like that? How? She burned half the city to the ground!"

I would be angry too. She is a better option. _Anyone else_ is a better option. Knowing what I know about Westerosi history, it seems to me that they have an affinity to ruthless leaders. Cersei Lannister is hardly the first one.

At first, I wondered if she would be allowed to proclaim herself queen. Seeing as she was the wife of Robert Baratheon, the usurper, and as all of their children are dead, she is the one to take over. By right, one stolen from Dany's family, she is the one who gets to sit on the throne.

What I do not understand is the same thing Dany is angry about. How can the people accept her after what she did? Not only Cersei, any one of them? At first, they had the Mad King. As Ser Barristan told us all, they wanted Dany's brother to rule them, not the Mad King. Why did they not try to change it? Protest, ask for it or something. I understand that anyone with so much power in their hands wouldn't exactly be willing to step down, but they should have at least showed some resistance. And now? Their Queen to be is burning the city with wildfire? Will they protest? I doubt it.

"Fear, Your Grace," Yara Greyjoy tells her, making all of us turn our heads towards here. "People are afraid. For many years before this, the Lannisters have been the ones who truly ruled Westeros, through those weak Baratheon shits, and even your father before that. They only difference now is they openly have one sitting on the throne. People simply are afraid. Afraid of Cersei Lannister, afraid of a change. And tired of paying for and dying in a war. They would rather take it as it is and live a miserable life in peace than die at war." she tells us. I look to Tyrion, waiting for him to disagree or to share his view on this topic, but to my surprise, he stays silent. I thought he would say it was something else and not fear, but apparently, that is the truth of it. Two out of three Westerosi in this meeting seem to think that fear is what is keeping people silent.

It's always fear, isn't it?

The slaves did not rise up against their Masters because of fear. Fear of who would come after them, fear of who will punish them for their disobedience. Only when they had Dany to stand behind, did they start fighting the Masters. And now, the same is happening with Westeros. Fear keeps them silent. That is, unless, until someone comes around and offers them a better option. That someone is Dany… well, this might be better than we ever hoped for.

"Do you think that they would join someone else if they are offered a better option?" Dany asks.

"Not with ease, Your Grace," Tyrion says, scrubbing his eyebrows thoughtfully. "Robb Stark is a better option than Cersei is and the people are not running to stand behind him," he tells us. As he mentions the name of the Northern King, I look at Theon Greyjoy. Knowing what I know about him and the Northern King, I knew I had reason to pay attention to his reaction. He reacted just as I thought he would; he looked down, staring blankly at the table. It would appear that he truly does feel guilt, just as Tyrion had suggested. "They do not have free will, Your Grace. They never really have. If their liege lords swear to Cersei, so will they because that is all they know to do. And even if they did act differently, they would be considered rebels."

"The whole system of Westeros is wrong," I speak up, for the first time. The moment I feel eyes on me, I know I should have stayed silent and inconspicuous. "If no one can have their say, you are left with people who are not satisfied, who are not happy, who are just existing, rather than living. And a rather miserable existence, at that. And if anyone manages to stand up and raise a rebellion, wars will happen every few years and only make them more miserable. Some rebellions will be stopped on time, but others might be successful, depending on how many people the ruler managed to make miserable."

"Even if we give them the ability to choose their own ruler, they will still make mistakes," Tyrion shakes his head as he disagrees with me. "They will choose a ruler and then they will change their mind. People are often stupid. And stupid people make stupid decisions."

"But they are someone's people," I sigh. "Someone needs to rule them, someone needs to keep them safe and content, whether they are stupid or not. It is easy for you to speak. You are members of ruling families. Who are we here? We have a Targaeryen Queen, a Lannister lord and a Greyjoy Queen and Lord. All of you… ask me. Ask Grey Worm. Ask Missandei. We might not be stupid as some of them are, but we _are_ the people. We are normal people, commoners, the same as the ones you want to rule. The only difference is that we are here, sitting with you and not there, wondering what suffering we have to endure next."

That is why I could never be a ruler.

I wasn't brought up to think in that way. I grew up on the other side, living a different life. A more realistic, difficult life. And the biggest irony is that I was luckier than most. I had a good life. Most of us… they are not so fortunate. It is by pure luck that I got sold as a little girl, to be trained to be a handmaiden and I ended up serving a girl who ended up being a Queen. I could have been sold as a whore. If I was a few years older, I would have no doubt been laying on my back with my legs spread for some pig in a brothel somewhere instead of advising the Mother of Dragons. My destiny could have been far worse.

As would have been Missandei's, had she not known many languages when she was sold. Had she not been a quick learner, with her beauty, her master would have whored her out to any man willing to pay his price. And I cannot even imagine what kind of life Grey Worm has already had to live. I have seen enough, when I saw how the Masters treated the Unsullied. I will never forget the moment when I saw their Master cutting a soldier, only for the soldier to thank him afterwards. We know. We know what it is like, even if we are luckier than most.

"We cannot guess," Dany speaks up. We all look up at her as she stands up and starts pacing around the room. "We do not know what the people want. We do not know if they want me or not. But it is my duty to fight for what is mine by right. It is my duty to offer them another option, a better option. We cannot make any guesses. We will not know until we do it. And it needs to be done, and soon."

"And when will it be done?" Yara asks.

"As soon as we have the Dornish ships on our side," Dany announces. "We will wait for Lord Varys to return with their forces. Once that is done, we are leaving for Westeros. We are going to restore Westeros to what it should be. What it always should have been."

The Queen has spoken. After that, who would dare disagree?

I certainly don't. She said nothing that I disagree with. As of now, she is not showing any signs of wanting to burn every living creature in Westeros. So long as that is not her plan, I am more than willing to support her wholeheartedly.

I was talking about what the people want, but Dany did raise a good point. What do they want? How could they want something different if they do not know that something different exists?

They do not know what they want. They do not even know of a different option. Perhaps, if Dany offers them a different life, a more peaceful land, with a better system, they might just join in willingly, just as their ancestors did with Aegon the Conqueror. And she does have a point. We cannot guess. We need to simply step up and do it.

And it would appear that that the time to do it has come.

* * *

Missandei is not in her chambers and my only guess is that she is with Grey Worm. The two are still having language lessons, although I cannot say if they are focused on the common tongue anymore.

If we are going to war, if we are going to move all of our forces across the narrow sea as soon as Lord Varys returns, preparations need to be made. And we are going to need Grey Worm for that as well. How am I supposed to know what an army needs to bring for such a long journey? Missandei may be one of the most intelligent people I have ever met, but I doubt even she could know such information.

The Small Council will have to do the heavy lifting and I am ready for it.

I walk past the balcony, only to stop in my tracks after seeing a silhouette on it. No Unsullied would ever bend his back in such a way, nor would a Dothraki. And it definitely wasn't Lord Tyrion.

"My lord," I speak up, watching as Theon Greyjoy jumps up in surprise. He turns around, nodding his head before directing his eyes to the floor below him. "Do you mind if I join you?" I ask, smiling, even if he doesn't make eye contact with me.

"Yes, of course." He mumbles, nodding his head.

I promised myself I would keep an eye on him. Having a conversation with him would certainly help me accomplish that. Even if I have a slight suspicion that I will be the one who does most of the talking. I walk over to him and stand to his right, leaned on the wall as I look over Meereen, sprawled out before us. The view is really magnificent, hundreds of tiny structures packed tightly in between thin and thick streets, with people as tiny as ants scurrying in between them, living out their lives. Smells of sweat, the bay, and herbs carry up on the breeze to the pyramid.

"It is beautiful, isn't it?" I ask. I do not really need an answer to that. I am not surprised when he stays silent. "I have only ever known Essos. Lys is fairly beautiful. But Meereen is my favorite," I sigh, forcing a kind smile as I look up at him. "Is there a place of equal beauty in Westeros? I have asked Lord Tyrion, but he had only said that King's Landing is full of snakes and smells like shit." I chuckle, hoping that the jest might loosen him up. But not even joking works. He still looks, uncomfortable.

"I'm afraid I have never been to King's Landing, my Lady." He tells me.

"Just Milani," I remind him. If people keep calling me my lady, I might as well just ask from Dany to give me a lady's title. After all, she was the one who talked about titles and lands. Being a Lady would sort out all of the confusion. "I do not have a title and I am not highborn. Just Milani."

"I have never been to King's Landing, Milani."

"What about the rest of Westeros?" I wonder. "Did you not see any of it during the time you were fostered at Winterfell?" I ask, finally making him react. He looks as if I pulled the carpet from under his feet. Shocked and alert, he stares at me, not saying a word. "Lord Tyrion told me he met you there." I explain. The uneasiness is still there, but other than that, he shows no other emotions.

"I'm afraid Winterfell is not as beautiful as Meereen." He tells me.

"Oh. Well, that's a shame," I sigh, still keeping my eyes on him. "Would you ever like to go back there?" I ask and this time, his head snaps in my direction. I am no longer smiling and I can tell from his facial expression, he knows I know. He knows I know more about his sordid past than he would like me to know.

"I believe I will not have a chance to return to Winterfell." is all he says.

"I do wonder about that, my lord," I admit, pretending as if I am asking this out of sheer curiosity. "As far as I understand, you betrayed your friend, whom now reigns as the King in the North. Now that you are no longer fighting yourself, but on someone else's side, why is it not his side? Did you not try to join him again or are you simply waiting for a perfect moment to change sides?"

Well, I am not holding back anymore. I know more than he thought and I am no longer keeping it a secret. He has a chance to explain himself, right now, before I make him do the same in front of Dany. Accusing her adviser of possible future betrayal would be a horrible move if it proves to be untrue. If I am going to accuse him of anything, I need to be sure of it.

"Judging by the way you speak, you have never betrayed everyone." He utters.

"No, I can't say that I have."

Why would that be a disadvantage? I might not be able to see it from his perspective, but at least I still have my honor. At night, I do not have trouble sleeping.

"The guilt that follows you as soon as you realize that you have made the wrong decision? It is next to unbearable. If you feel it once, you will never forget it and will never be the same again." he tells me, still finding the stone floor more interesting than me.

"I am not sure how that guilt of yours is helping Robb Stark." I comment, before I can stop myself. I know I should not have said that, but I had to. Theon Greyjoy was in the same position in which I am now, if not even better. An adviser to a leader, he to a King and I to a Queen. He is of noble birth and I am not. Everything else is absolutely the same. He and the Northern King grew up together, just as Dany and I did. Tyrion tells me they seemed to be close friends, more like brothers than anything else.

Theon Greyjoy was where I am now and that only makes it more baffling. How could he betray his brother? If they were the same as Dany and I are now… I would never do that to her. Not for my own glory, not for my own position, not even to save my own life. I would sooner die than turn my back on her.

I do not like this man, not one bit. Anything he could possibly say in his defense will not satisfy me. I do not like or trust him.

"It may not be helping Robb Stark, but it is helping Daenerys Targaryen," he speaks up, sounding defensive for the first time throughout this conversation. "I have done it once and I have no intention of doing it again. I will have to live with my mistakes and the very least I can do is to make sure I do not make them again. I will not betray our Queen." he tells me.

The rational part of me wants to believe in change, in fixing your wrongs and in second chances. The less rational, much larger part of me does not want to believe him at all. I need to find middle ground.

"She trusts you. She trusts your sister. So I will too," I say, taking one step closer to him. He steps away from me, trying to keep space between us, but I persist, taking another step in his direction, closing the space between us so that our noses were almost touching. "But if you so much as show the _slightest_ intention of doing anything that could harm her or her cause in any way, I will do for her what you should have done for your friend. I will stop you. Even if that means I will have to cut your throat myself."

Watching as all color leaves his face, I offer him a small smile, probably confusing him even more.

"I wish you a good night, my Lord. Sleep well." I say sweetly, nodding my head before I turn around and leave.

I never thought a day would come when I would have to threaten someone. I also never thought a day would come when I would be more than willing to follow that threat through. But the day is here.

If he does anything to her, if he betrays her in any possible way, I will not hold back my wrath.

We might have been in a same situation once, but we are not the same. As difficult it might get sometimes, I would never consider turning my back to Dany, even less, stabbing her in it. Unlike Theon Greyjoy, I will not forget where I came from and whose food I ate for the bigger part of my life.

Dany is the reason I am alive and living a life of luxury by her side, not starving in some brothel. I will never forget what she has done for me. I seem to have a better memory than Theon Greyjoy.


	8. Chapter 8

**Here we go guys, a new chapter is here!  
Thank you so much for your continued support, it really means a lot to me, both with "The Missing Pieces" and my other stories. I've been working really hard to write good stories to you and it really means a lot to me when I see that you actually like them. Once again, big thank you to my amazing beta reader, darkwolf76. She writes amazing stories so go and check her out! And as always, if you like the story, follow, favorite and review. It really means a lot to me :) **

**I hope you enjoy the chapter. Next one… well, we're off to Westeros! :)**

* * *

"I have to leave Daario."

"What? Why?" I ask, confused and slightly guilty. We were just talking about the weather! How did we get to the topic of lovers? And Daario is not a conversation topic we enjoy, even if we have gotten past our misunderstanding. Yet, now she blindsides me with this comment.

"I cannot bring him with me if I want to make a marriage alliance," she tells me as she pours us both some more wine. "Despite the fact that men visit brothels often, they seem to feel that a woman should not do the same. I cannot have a lover."

"You are a Queen," I laugh. "You can do whatever you want, Dany."

"But I can't, not if I want to have a good marriage. As good as an arranged marriage can get," she shrugs. In this moment, as she looks down in her goblet, she reminds me so much of Tyrion Lannister. The way she is holding the goblet, the words she uses, her facial expression… she has become more cynical since he joined us. "I would have let you bring Daario if you had wanted him for yourself but…"

"But I might have to marry someone as well," I finish in her stead. "You are a Queen. You are forgiven. Seeing as I do not have as much to offer, I'd say it's a good thing I am still a maid." I mumble, wondering if I have become a bit like Tyrion Lannister as well.

"Milani, I…"

"No, Dany," I interrupt her, already knowing what she is going to say. "I have agreed to it. I'm not a warrior. I can't help you in the battlefield. I'm not a diplomat or politician either. Nor am I a Lannister who grew up in King's Landing, familiar with every dirty secret of every Westerosi Lord in the Seven Kingdoms. I am your friend and a woman. If I can only help you by saying some vows and going to a strange man's bed, so be it. I can take it."

"It sounds horrible when you say it like that." Dany sighs.

"It definitely not ideal," I mumble, seeing the guilt flash on her face, if only for a moment. "But it is not like you are forcing me into it. Besides, you will be doing the exact same thing. Do not make it sound as if it is some sort of great sacrifice, because it's not. It is very trivial and unimportant."

"It is the rest of your life, Milani."

"Which could be a period of a few decades or a few months," I remind her. For all we know, we could fail in our conquest of Westeros and die within the year. "I'm a maid and you have my full permission to sell me. But whatever you do Dany, just please do not sell me to someone twice my age."

"I have been talking to Tyrion about that," she tells me. Now, this I was not familiar with. "I will probably offer my own hand in marriage to the King in the North. There are two viable possibilities for you. Robin Arryn, Lord of the Vale, or if Tyrion manages to get him on our side, his brother."

"Robin Arryn," I say, nodding my head. "What do we know about him?"

"He is fifteen."

"So, a child or a Kingslayer, who sired three children to his sister?" I wonder out loud.

"Milani, I know these aren't the most appealing options, but…"

"No, Dany, it is alright." I lie. I don't know what I was expecting but I had hoped that better options would have been on the table. But this knowledge changes nothing. Well, it does not change my decision, even if it does change the way I feel about it. I felt bad before, but now… perhaps I could marry Lord Tyrion? No, he is already on our side. That would be pointless. Well, at the very least I won't have to get shackled to Theon Greyjoy. I would hate that.

"The King in the North does have a brother," Dany adds. "One of an age with us, according to Tyrion. But he is a bastard. He does not have a name, or a title. However, if the King in the North refuses my hand, perhaps we could still secure an alliance through a marriage between you and the brother, or even the King himself. Because we definitely need to get the Northerners on our side if possible."

"And they are closer to our age?" I ask.

"Yes," she confirms. "We will not know until we get there, but if it is possible for me to offer you to someone of a high standing and young, I will do it."

"And if not, I will live with it," I shrug. "Oh well. Let us toast to marriage and all the joys it brings."

* * *

Tyrion had warned me that the weather would be colder than I'm used to. The long awaited winter had almost arrived in Westeros, as he claimed. The silk dresses and open shoes that we normally wear will have to be left behind. I have already ordered new clothes for Dany, the servants, Missandei and myself. We had a great deal of fun, just as we used to have as girls, deciding which color she should wear and why. I wasn't surprised when she decided to keep her wardrobe dark though.

As much as I enjoyed ordering and designing clothes, I do not enjoy folding them.

Dany's clothes are already packed; it is my own clothes I am struggling with. I decided to emulate Dany's wardrobe to show my support for my Queen, even down to Dany's color scheme. Grey and black, thick and warm. I imagine I will look back on those barefoot walks as a fond memory. With a knock on the door, Missandei finally returns.

"Come in," I call, laughing to myself. "I thought you had left me to suffer through this tiresome task all on my own."

"Well, I can certainly help, if you want me to," Daario speaks up, causing me to turn around in shock. "What would you like me to start with? Dresses or undergarments?" he smirks at me.

"I thought you were Missandei," I explain, although he probably knows that already. He is the last person I want to speak to. Especially while in my own chambers; I remember very vividly that day when I woke up to find him in my bed. I do not wish for that to happen again. Yet, as annoyed as I am with his presence, I do not want to be rude. A part of me, a part which I hate deeply, still keenly remembers the fact that he did not take advantage of me that night, even though he had every opportunity to do so. "What can I help you with?" I ask, forcing myself to be polite.

"Am I correct to assume that you all are leaving soon?" he asks.

"We are," I confirm. "As soon as the Martell fleet joins ours, we will be leaving."

"I imagine that you already know that I will not be joining you all on the journey," he sighs and I say nothing. I know, but what can I say? That I feel bad for him? In all honesty, I am relieved that he will not be joining us. I do not need him to parade my mistakes in front of me. "I will be staying behind in Meereen, to help her rule here."

"What do I have to do with any of that?" I ask him, giving up on the dress I was trying to fold. I throw it on the bed and I fold my arms, looking at him with a mixture of confusion and anger. "Do you think I urged her to make a decision? I didn't. I haven't said anything to her about you either way, even if leaving you behind is the smartest decision she could have made."

"I am not questioning her decision. I just don't like it," he informs me, taking a step in my direction. As much as I want to, I do not back away. He has not overstepped his boundaries, but if he takes one step more in my direction, he will be dangerously close to doing that. "I don't think you have anything to do with it. I am not here to accuse you of anything, Milani."

"Why are you here then?" I ask.

Why is he here? Even if he feels some sort of attraction towards me, we do not have some sort of strong connection that is impossible to ignore. He knows I dislike him, almost as much as I dislike myself for letting him get too close to me. We are not lovers, we are not friends and we are not pining away for one another. Why is he here then? What could he possibly want from me now?

"I am here to say goodbye."

"Oh," I mumble, surprised by his words. "Well… Goodbye, Daario. Thank you for everything." I tell him. What else can I say? I do not want to be rude and roll my eyes, even though I don't consider this exchange important. I am not going to fall into his arms, telling him I will miss him terribly.

"Is that all I'm going to get?" he asks, sounding full of himself, as ever.

"What would you like to get?" I frown in confusion.

"Would it be too much to ask for a goodbye kiss?" he smiles at me. I have to admit, he is quite a bold man.

"Yes, it would be," I say, cracking a smile when he pretends to be disappointed, putting a hand on his heart and faking a hurt look on his face. He had known I would refuse, he had to have. And he said it all the same. Had he been hoping for me to give in? Or did he just want to tease me? Probably the latter. "I'll tell you what, Daario Naharis. Come to me on my last day in Meereen. Perhaps I will change my mind by then."

"And if not?"

"Well, I suppose you will go back to missing our Queen, then," I say, noticing him trying to hold back his signature smirk. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I really must return to my packing. Thank you."

I turn my back to him, giving that one dress my full attention, but still listening to hear whether or not he will walk away or walk towards me. I breathe out a sigh of relief when I hear him walk away and close the door behind him. I was trying to be nice, perhaps a bit playful, poking fun at his 'desire', or his need to get Dany from his mind. I hadn't even considered that he might take that as a sign. A wrong sign.

Luckily, he didn't. He had walked away.

Dany did have a point, even if she had chosen the wrong man. I should have had more fun. Soon enough, I will be paraded as a prize for an alliance. I should have taken advantage of my freedom while I still had it. If that meant being with a man out of wedlock, I should have done it.

But Daario is not that man. If I was going to do it purely for pleasure, I would only do it with a man that made my knees weak and my heart beat faster.

Perhaps I am a romantic. In all likelihood, I will never feel those feelings. After all, I've never come close to feeling that way about a man, and I have met a lot of men. Perhaps those things never happen at all and we all live in a lie. Love is a peculiar thing, not easily understandable, but I do not have love on my mind. I am thinking of passion.

If I had met a man who made me want to give up everything just for a night in his bed, I would have done it. Daario Naharis is not that man, even if I am sure that he has many, many talents. I will never know such passion, not unless I am one of the lucky ones to find it in their spouse.

I wish I had had the chance to be mischievous. There is just something… exciting to the thought of being with someone out of wedlock, simply giving up yourself to them, without expecting anything in return. Not a piece of land, not gold, or a powerful name. Just… passion, pure passion. But that man has never showed up and now, it is too late. I will marry and that will be the end of it.

I imagine it is guilt, mixed with pleasure. You feel bad about it, but not truly, not deep down.

I will never know that.

Dany was right. I should have taken advantage of it all when I had the chance.

* * *

"Do you ever wish we never left Pentos?" I ask, watching as Dany turns around and looks at me in wonder. "Do you just ever wish that everything was the same as it was before? Before you married Khal Drogo and became a Khaleesi? It was so much easier back then. We could have just stayed there and laughed at Viserys as he tried and failed. We would have lived in peace. Our greatest worry would have been whether we would eat pears or grapes for breakfast."

The more time passes, the more I wish that was the case. I yearn for simplicity we used to live in, back then. I never talk much about it, especially not with her. The last thing I would want is to make her wish she had never done the things she did. But my words are occasionally faster than my mind. And now, when we are only days away from leaving Meereen, the fear grows and so does regret.

"I wonder about it every day," she admits as she looks away from me and down at the ground. "I feel fairly certain that we would have been happier had we stayed in Pentos. You are right. Viserys would have failed miserably. But I did have happiness with Drogo, Milani," she sighs as she looks up at me. "But this is not about my happiness, not anymore. If it was, I would stay here and live out the rest of my days in peace. This is about getting back what is mine by right. It is about giving people peace and a good land to live in. It is all about duty, not happiness."

"If you are just a creature of duty, is there anything you can look forward to?" I ask. While I understand her views, I do not agree with them. Not completely, anyway. "How can someone be a good ruler if they are miserable and not enjoying their life? You heard what Lord Tyrion said about the usurper. He did not start the war for glory; he started it for a woman and for revenge. And what did he do, once he got his revenge and lost the woman? He brought the realm to the brink of death. Not singlehandedly, he just let it rot while parasites around him feasted on his wealth and power. I wouldn't call him a man of honor, nor a man of duty, but he certainly wasn't a man content with his life, was he?"

"He had no business being on that throne to begin with. Why should we be surprised that he did not do a good job while on it?" she retorts. Well, she does have a point. He was never meant to be king. But Dany's oldest brother had been and… he made his fair share of mistakes. Some would say it was those mistakes that led to Dany's family to losing its power. Others would say it was because of their father. I suppose it does not even mater now; either way, they lost it.

"Dany, you are right," I tell her, smiling at her. "You are better than all of them. Even if I was not your friend, I would believe that. And I believe you will be good at it. You truly do care about people. But I do not want you to lose yourself. I do not want to see you become just one more miserable monarch."

"I will not be miserable," she laughs as she walks over towards me, linking are arms. "I will have you to save me from that. With you and Missandei, that will never happen. Lord Tyrion is funny too."

"I admire his wits but his humor is not to my taste."

"Oh, don't be ridiculous," she laughs as we start to walk down the balcony that stretches all around the pyramid. "I know you like him. You don't want to admit it, but I know it." she says, sounding all-knowing.

"I admire his wits," I mumble, repeating the same words I said before. "And I suppose that he is quite the drinking companion. But I do not consider him a friend, Dany. I truly don't."

"Because you still don't know him well enough," she nods her head, understanding. "Give it time."

"Give what time?" I laugh. "Dany, I am alright. I have you, I have Missandei, I even have Grey Worm. You will marry me off to some Lord and whether I like him or not, I will have to get used to a while new family anyway. I will be alright and I will not be alone. It is you I am worried about, not me."

"I believe I just found a flaw in that plan," she tells me, her mood suddenly turning somber. "All along I thought I would have you by my side, no matter what. When you get married, you will not be able to stay by my side, will you? You will have to follow your husband."

"Who will follow you. Whoever my husband may be, he will be your ally."

"And once the war is over, he will want to go back to his castle take you with him." Dany shakes her head. As she speaks, the same realization that struck her just moments ago touched me as well. We will have to part ways and that was never something I counted on.

"Does it have to be done?" I ask, despite knowing that I have agreed to it a very long time ago. "I would rather stay with you, Dany. I don't need anything that a husband might offer me. Keep me as your adviser. Make me your handmaiden or something. I'd rather be a servant than to be leagues away from you. You are my sister. My family."

"Maybe there will be a way to avoid it," Dany shakes her head, not sounding too optimistic despite her words. "I don't know. Perhaps if… I do not need allies. I need them, but maybe… Milani, don't you want that?" she asks, looking baffled. "Don't you want to have a family of your own? I will never stop being your sister, but don't you want a chance to have a husband, children of your own?"

"I am not against the idea of it if I ever meet the right man," I say, watching her frown in confusion. I can't even explain it. "I am not against it. I want it. But I am yet to meet a person I want it with. I do not want it if it is with a man I do not know, or a man I do not like. I do not even know if I would be a good mother."

"Oh, don't say that," Dany shakes her head. "You would be a wonderful mother. And you should not give up on that with such ease. You don't know what it's like to know you will never be a mother."

And now I feel guilty. How could I have forgotten? She only has her dragons. She lost the only child she would ever have when that witch… but she is not a reliable source, is she? Surely, someone who resented Dany so much... But how many times did Daario spend in Dany's bed? Dany believes in it, why shouldn't I?

It is easy to give up on something you never really wanted. If I was to find love, true love, a man who I would want to share my life with, nothing could have stopped me from being with him, having a family with them. I would want it with all my heart. But I don't have that man. And how can I miss something I've never had? It is easy for me to not want it when I have never felt it before.

Unlike me, Dany has felt it. She loved Drogo, despite the horrible way their marriage started. She had prepared herself for an arranged marriage. She would get sold off to the one who has the best offer. Same will happen to me, but if I have any luck, I will grow to love him like Dany loved Drogo. She loved that man with all her heart. She wanted to give him a son, ten children if she could. Not only did she lose the child, but she also believes she lost the ability to have any more ever.

Yes, it is easy for me to say that I do not want to be a mother when I can be a mother. Dany does not have the luxury, regardless of how much power she holds. She has no choice and I do. But just because I have the chance does not mean I should take it. The ability to give birth to a child does not guaranty that I will be a good mother, not in any way.

Cersei Lannister. Lord Tyrion claims she loved her children more than anything in this world. And all three of them are dead. Why? Because the ability to be a mother does not make you a good mother.

"Dany…" I start, unsure if I should raise this question or not. "If you cannot have children, what will you do?" I ask. I do not want to say it out loud, but it needed to be asked. I don't know if she has thought about it, but as someone who advises her, I need to know that she has it in mind. It appears that I cannot be a good friend and a smart adviser at the same time. "The crown you will wear will need an heir if wish to have stability during your reign."

"I know," she replies in a cold tone, looking away from me again but still keeping our arms linked. "You do not have to worry. I have that in mind. Though I am not sure as to what I will do."

"Lie?" I ask. She raises her eyebrow at me, but I simply shrug my shoulders. "If nothing else is enough, you do not have to share that information with anyone. By the time they regret it, it will be too late."

"And then what? Live with their anger for the rest of my life?"

"You are not a commoner. You are a Queen," I shake my head, angry at the very thought. I know Dany better than I know myself. She would never let anyone belittle her, no matter how much she cared for them. She is a strong woman. "No one would dare and do that, Dany. You will never have to live with the horrors some commoners have to face."

"But I will be miserable, won't I?" she asks. I… I do not know how to answer that. "I do not know if I will marry. I do not know if anyone would want a barren woman, crowned Queen or not. I might live out my life alone, for all I know. I promised you that I will not give you away to just any man, but now that I know you do not want to be separated from me… and I do not want to be separated from you. I am afraid I am not as smart as I was before. If I was ever smart to begin with."

"You are," I disagree. It has nothing to do with intelligence. It depends on the difficulty of the situation, the difficulty of choosing one option over the other. Sometimes you can't listen to your heart. Other times you can't listen to your brain. And there are situations where neither is speaking up. "Whatever you decide to do, Dany, I will take it as it is. I will do what is best for you and your cause."

"But what about you?"

"Let me put it like this," I say, with a sad smile. "You will not marry me to just anyone, you promised it yourself. Of course, we cannot know much about a man just by his name, but… a savage, a brute, a liar and a cheater would still be a better companion than the one I would have had I not met you. I would have been a slave, Dany. A translator, a maid, a whore, I do not know, but I would not have my freedom if I did not end up being your maid. What I am trying to say is that, no matter what you decide, I will still have a better life than the one I would have had, had I not met you. And I trust you to make the right decision, whether you ask for my opinion or not. I leave that power in your hands." I tell her.

After everything, I truly do not have the time to worry myself about it. I am not troubled by whom I will end up being married to, not as I am troubled by the fact that I will, at one point, probably have to leave her side. The only thing I ask for is for him not to be twice my age. I don't know if that will be possible or not, and neither does she, but that is the only thing that would matter to me. Even if I would prefer to stay with her, unmarried and working, than married off to some old, half-dead, man.

"We will see in a few moons I suppose," she tells me and I nod my head. As I was about to speak up, a loud sound makes us both look around in wonder. A horn has sounded. Once for friends, twice for foes. It only blows once. "What is it?" she asks, rushing towards the edge of the balcony to look down on the city. I follow her at once, looking around.

I see nothing. I just see people going about with their business. I see a woman running after children, I see the children playing with one another. I see a blacksmith hitting a sword he was making and I see street vendors bargaining with those who want to buy something from them. All is well.

I look up at the gates, but they are closed. The sound didn't come from there.

"The harbor!" Dany realizes at the same moment I do and I follow her as she rushes to the other side of the pyramid. With each step, her pace quickens and so does mine. "They're here." She says the moment she gets to the edge of the balcony. I stand next to her and I see them as well.

At the very least, 20 ships, in the distance. I cannot see if there are any ships behind them, but I imagine there are. The sigil of Dorne was visible even from here; it's bright, orange color making the pierced Sun on it seem as the real Sun, all the way from here. As I watch, I see more ships in the distance.

"Lord Varys did not disappoint," I smile, watching the ships before us. She has two Westeros noble houses backing her cause: Greyjoys and Martells. She already has powerful allies and she hasn't even stepped foot in Westeros. It will not be easy, but it might not be as difficult as I imagined it to be.

"No, he did not," she agrees with a smile. "And it would appear that a marriage alliance might not be necessary after all."

"What do you mean?" I ask in confusion.

"Look at the sails," she tells me, pointing in the direction of the ships that were approaching Meereen's harbor. "The ones in the back. Green with a gold flower. That is the sigil of House Tyrell."

"The ones who were allied to the Lannisters?" I ask.

"And the ones that had members whom Cersei Lannister killed in that Sept," Dany nods, smiling as she watches the ships that are about to join her cause. "Cersei Lannister will live to regret not killing them all."


	9. Chapter 9

**Here we go guys, here's another one.**

 **There will be a POV change in this one. Let's just say we'll find out what's been going on in Westeros! :)**

 **I'm still battling a writer's block so I'm not sure when I'll have a new chapter ready for you but I am not going to make you wait for too long.**

 **Thank you so much for your continued support, as always. Your reviews make me soooo happy and give me the strength I need to fight this stupid block so keep them coming!**

 **Let me know what you think! Follow, favorite, review! Love ya all! :)**

* * *

 _Dany was shaking. Her whole body was trembling like a leaf when she entered the tent. I practically yell at the Dothraki girls to leave. Of course, they do not understand the common tongue, or Valyrian, and I do not speak Dothraki. I wave my hands about to make them understand that they need to leave us alone._

 _Once they finally give us much needed privacy, Dany breaks down in tears. It takes me a long time to calm her down and even now, while she's silent and lying in the bathtub, I can see ripples in the water, caused by her shaking._

 _What do I do I even say in a situation like this? How do I comfort her? What can I do to make it better? How can I comfort her about something I know nothing about? And even if I did know… It needs to be called by its real name. He might be her husband but she did not want it. She did not want him and he knew it. He took her nonetheless._

 _I'm sorry your husband is not considerate? I am sorry you were… raped?_

 _Is this pain and suffering what duty entails? If so, I do not want it for myself or Dany. She may have been given to Khal Drogo, but that does not make her a rag doll for him to play with as he pleases. And somehow, that's exactly what all of them think. I am sure it is the same in Westeros, as it is here, with the Pentoshi, with the Myrish and even with the Dothraki. There is not a single society that I've seen or heard where men do not view women as their possessions._

" _Do you want me to bring you something?" I break the silence with a question. That's the only safe thing I can actually say. It's a way for me to offer some small form of help, to remind her that I am here. No matter what happens or how difficult it might get, she will never be alone. I am well aware that I cannot do much to help her. What I am offering her is essentially nothing other than my friendship. But I know how much our friendship means to her. At times like these, that might just be the only thing she needs. A friend she can talk to and trust._

 _A friend she could share silence with, if that is what she wishes to do._

" _No. Thank you."_

 _What was I expecting? Her to be all talkative and bubbly?_

" _Dany if you…" I start, looking down as I try to find the right words to use. "If you need… If you want to talk, I am here for you. No matter what happens, I am always here for you." I mumble._

" _I know that," she tells me in a low voice. I watch as she reaches out her hand. Confused, I walk towards her. She grabs a hold of my hand, confirming that it was what she wanted to do; she is reaching out for me. This is nothing but it means so much. I am not doing anything, other than holding her hand. But sometimes, a kind touch is all that someone needs. I know what is being unsaid and I think she does to. I cannot protect her from the evil she is facing. I will not be able to protect her from all the evil we will live to see. But at least I will be here, by her side. I will be here to comfort her, to help her and to face that evil with her._

* * *

"Milani, are you alright?"

"Do I look alright to you, Missandei?" I ask, turning my head around to give her a good look of my haggard face.

"Not really, no," the girl shakes her head, looking slightly alarmed by my appearance. "Can I help you?"

"I don't think you can," I sigh, closing my eyes, hoping that will help me ignore the swaying of the ship we are on. "I don't think that… Excuse me." I mumble as another wave of sickness hits me and I wretch into the bucket I'm clutching for the fourth time in a row. I'm going to need a bigger bucket.

"Milani, do you want me to call a healer?" Missandei asks. As I am staring at the bucket, I don't see the look on her face but the worried tone of her voice does not escape me.

"I'm sick because of the sea, I'm not dying Missandei," I roll my eyes. "Just… let me be sick in private. I will reemerge once I feel stable enough."

"If you need anything, call for me." she tells me.

"I'll be sure to do that, Missandei," I say, knowing very well that I will not be capable of calling for anyone if this continues. "Thank you." I tell the girl. Moments later, I hear the door close behind her. as soon as I know she is out, I allow my hands to give up and I fall down on the hard, wooden floor.

I imagine death would feel far less torturous than this.

How is this possible? I have traveled on ships before and not once was I sick. Now? We have been on the open water for days, I have lost count of how many times I've emptied my stomach and I am still struggling to adapt. At times, I will feel better and I fool myself into thinking that the sickness is over, that I can finally be a normal person again. And then it will creep up on me when I least expect it.

If this continues, I will miss Meereen more than I ever thought I would. Hell, I will even miss Daario!

Slowly, I turn to my side and lift myself up. I don't have any strength left in my arms but I manage to lean onto the bed, finally sitting and not crouching over a bucket or laying on the floor. It is a nice change but a bed would be even better. I take a few deep breaths as I prepare for the next obstacle; it takes me more effort than it normally would but I manage to hoist myself up on the bed, and then I hug my pillow as I try to slow my breathing. One in, one out. One in, one out. The bucket is here. If I get sick again, I'll live. Just as I have lived through the last few days. I will live. I am strong enough. This sea? It has nothing on me.

I can do it. I know I can.

With that thought, I roll around, nearly falling from the bed as I lunge for the bucket again.

* * *

Fresh air. I didn't comprehend just how much I needed it, not until it hit my lungs and filled them up completely. I can smell the salt from the sea. It will take me a while to get used to it but it is a nice change. Like all the big cities do, Meereen has a certain foul smell to it. After dwelling there a while, you get used to it and you do not even notice it as it fills your nostrils. It is only when you breathe in pure, fresh air, that you realize you have been breathing in the smell of shit and sweat mixed with dust for many months.

I do not feel steady on my feet, not as much as I would like to feel. However, I have just enough balance to stand and walk and as of now, I am still managing to keep my breakfast down.

"Lady Milani!" I hear Tyrion call out. He must be making up titles on purpose now. I have completely given up on correcting anyone anymore. I am beginning to feel like one of those exotic birds that are trained to repeat words. I remember the turquoise one that was presented to Dany by one of the free citizens of Meereen. It lived with us for a day, before Viserion ate it.

"Lord Tyrion," I greet, bowing my head as I turn to him.

"It is nice to see you back on your feet," he comments, smirking up at me.

"It is nice to see you drunk on wine," I retort.

"Ah, but I am not," he chuckles. It takes me a moment to realize that he is not joking. He is hardly drunk at all times but he certainly looks more sober than the last time we have had a conversation. "The Queen has made a decision that her Hand will not indulge in his cups so much."

Dany had looked strangely worried when she shared with me how she planned to make Tyrion Hand of the Queen. She has never needed my permission to do anything and she is well aware of that. It took me a little while to realize how she didn't want my permission in any shape of form but that she wanted to see if I felt… hurt, I suppose. I am glad she did not say it out loud because I would call her foolish.

I am her friend, not a strong political adviser. I can guide her very well as a person but I do not know enough Westeros or its politics to be any use to her as Queen. In that area, I fall short compared to Tyrion Lannister.

Not to mention that I would rather remain in the background. Being her Hand would force me to stand right next to her, up front, not behind her. There has to be a reason that Tyrion Lannister came to her, in the strange land far away from his home. He can serve her as Hand of the Queen better than I ever could.

"That has to be one of her best decisions."

"Yet again, we disagree," Tyrion offers me a sour smile. It would appear that Dany has more faith in him than he himself does. I can't be bothered. He will get used to it. From what I have learned about him, he can be determined when he wants to. He told me once, _It is amazing to know how much we can achieve with just a little bit of willpower_. He should be able to remember his own words. Or perhaps the wine he drank prevents him from doing so. "Are you feeling better?"

"I'm afraid it's too early to tell," I sigh. I still feel weak, but better compared to the state I was in over the last few days. "I can't really understand it. The Dothraki cannot handle the open sea, I have seen them sick now, I have seen them sick before but back then, when we have travelled to Astapor, I never struggled with this sickness. And now it never leaves me."

"Too much wine?" Tyrion suggests.

"Definitely not."

"Are you with child?" he asks. He is joking. I need to remind myself of that whenever I speak to him.

"Definitely not," I repeat. "Maybe this is my body's way of telling me it is sick of everything."

"If that is so, you should better warn your body that it should get used to it," Tyrion raises his eyebrow as I try to fight a smile. As annoying as he can be, his responses can be the best of the best. Even if I would never admit it to him. "Just by being on this ship, we have started a war we cannot turn back from." He sighs, turning his head to look away from me at the open sea, as if he can already see the land that is waiting for us. It must be bitter sweet for him. He is coming home, but after the way he had left, I can't help but wonder if he truly wants to return there.

"At least I don't have plenty to lose," I mumble in a low voice, knowing that this is the most optimism I can muster at the moment.

"You might think that now," Tyrion tells me, still staring at the foaming sea water. "You'd be surprise. We don't truly realize just how much we have to lose until we actually lose it. Once you lose it, you can never get it back. And you realize just how foolish you once were."

What is he talking about? I would think he is talking about his family but I have heard plenty of things that would make me believe he wouldn't give them a second thought. Well, everyone but his brother. He told me that himself, the last time we had too much wine. The only member of his family who had held any love for him was his brother and he was fairly certain that he had ruined that relationship when he killed their father. The more I think about it, the more I realize just why he looks so solemn when talking about the tasks before us.

I can only hope, for Tyrion's sake, that Jaime Lannister will choose the right side before it is too late.

* * *

"How come this place is empty?" I ask as I look down on the map of Westeros. Lately, I have made an effort to brush up on my geography knowledge about the land we are heading to. Dany knows it far better than I do but it would appear that she still needs to study it, whether as a reminder or as a battle plan draft. "Dragonstone," I speak up, pointing at the island with my finger. "The ancestral seat of House Targaryen, recently ruled by Stannis Baratheon. Dangerously close to King's Landing," I say as I move my finger a little bit more south, right on the capital. "Currently ruled by Cersei Lannister. The Queen. Why would anyone leave this place unoccupied?" I ask her.

"Stannis went to fight Robb Stark," Dany tells me, eyeing the map before us. "He never returned."

"Why hasn't Robb Stark sent someone down there?" I ask, not seeing any sense in this. "I understand that he holds the North and the Riverlands. He has not attacked the South just yet but if he defeated the holder of Dragonstone, why didn't he send someone there to hold it for him? And why didn't Cersei Lannister send her men there once she saw that Robb Stark had not taken it?"

"Milani, what are you trying to say?" she asks, frowning at me. I've managed to cause her more worry.

"What if it is not empty?" I ask. I might be worrying her without a good reason but if what I am thinking is true, we might end up in a difficult situation once we get to her ancestral home. "It might have been when Lord Tyrion fled Westeros but since then, who's to say no one hasn't sent men to occupy it?"

"Lord Varys claims it is."

"I know Lord Varys knows many things but he is not almighty," I warn her. She should question this information, at least. I would not deem Lord Varys untrustworthy but he might be mistaken. Or there might be some information that he missed. "If I was Cersei Lannister or Robb Stark, I would send a small number of men there. Perhaps not even a small number. A number that can hold the castle if a dragon Queen decides to return to her homeland. I would do that," I tell her. I might not be a ruler or a military commander but I have common sense. "And I would make sure that such information does not reach those that could use it against me. I am positive that either one of them could have done a similar or same maneuver without it ever getting to Lord Varys or anyone of his… little birds."

"You think that someone might be in Dragonstone?" Dany asks with her raised eyebrows. I simply shrug my shoulders, knowing that the possibility might be untrue, just as well as the possibility that all the Westerosi rulers actually stupid enough to leave such a strategic location unoccupied. I might have a more strategic mind than I thought because I would never leave such place to be taken. And it's not conquering if we simply walk through the gates, without anyone there to stop us. "I understand. You might be right."

"But we can't change our plans now, can we?"

"No, we are still going to Dragonstone," Dany shakes her head, not doubting her earlier decision. "It is the only place that might be left unoccupied and it is important to not start charging at the people at once. I need my return to be peaceful. Dragonstone is the best option for that. Not to mention that it is my family's home, the place I was born. We have no other option but we can be more careful. We will not just stroll in. We can't risk it. We will be ready for an attack."

"Except we would be the ones attacking?" I ask in confusion.

"Yes," she nods her head. "It might come to that. It would be better if we could avoid it but if I have to use force, we will be ready for it. Dragonstone needs to belong to a Targaryen again."

So long as she is not threatening to light everyone on fire, I am completely certain that she is the one we are meant to follow. I can only hope that the people of Westeros will see it too. The fewer casualties we cause, the better it will turn out for us. If I had a god I believed in, I would be praying now that they have left Dragonstone empty. As Dany said herself, it is important that our first landing on Westerosi land is a peaceful one.

"Before we left Meereen, I had believed we would easily get your throne back. Now, despite all we have, I worry that what we have won't be enough." I admit. It is not easy to say it to her but I have a feeling that I will do her more good if I speak my mind honestly, rather than staying silent.

After all, that's what I've been doing for all these years, telling her the truth. That's why next to all the Hands and advisers she has, she still wants me by her side. Our friendship is built on the history we have together and on the honesty we share. I am the one who tells her to stop when I think she needs to reign herself in. I am the one who encourages her to keep going when she doubts herself.

If I fail to do that now, what is my purpose?

"I believe we have enough," she tells me in a steady tone and I can tell that she is carefully choosing her words. She's not as confident around just me as she is in front of others and I can understand that very well. I can never speak as boldly in front of her council like I can when I am alone with her. "And if we do not have enough now, we will have enough soon. We will do this together. I have told you this before, I cannot do it without you."

"You won't have to." I promise.

Win or lose, she will have me by her side always. That I decided many years ago, without either one of us being fully aware of it.

If our roles were changed, I am certain our relationship would be the same. If I was the leader and she the follower, I know she would support and believe me as I do now for her.

We do this together because there's no other way that we know.

* * *

"Well, what is it?" Jon asks, growing impatient with my silence.

Jon is the quiet one, not me. I imagine it is a jarring change for him to be in this situation.

"The Targaryen girl is coming," I tell him, letting the letter fall out of my hand and onto the table. Jon raises his eyebrows in surprise. I can't blame him. Months, even weeks ago, we were all certain that she would never make her way here. Just a few short years ago, we were hearing about her and her brother barely surviving in Essos, and now, she is coming back to Westeros, with three dragons and powerful alliances supporting her. "If what this letter says is true, she has the Martells and the Tyrells backing her." I say.

"The Tyrells?" Jon asks in confusion.

"The ones that are alive," I add. Cersei Lannister had ended most of them but as far as we know, Lady Olenna Tyrell is still very much alive. "And the entirety of Dorne. Not to mention three dragons."

"I thought that you were no longer interested in the South."

"I'm not," I confirm, looking away from my brother, feeling the anger grow. "I don't ever want to go south again. When I started the war, Father was still alive and a prisoner there. After that little prick killed him and, I kept fighting to save our sisters. There are here with us now. The North and the Riverlands are not under the rule of Cersei Lannister and if she ever tries to change that, I will stop her but I do not want to meddle into South's business otherwise. We are no longer connected to them in any way."

"Then let them fight," Jon tells me, looking as bothered by this as I feel. He is every bit a Northerner as I am. Lord Eddard Stark wasn't only my father. He lost him too. He left the Night's Watch to try and help me save him. He fought battles with me, he bled with me and he fought for North's freedom with me. "Let them fight their fights. It doesn't matter who sits on their throne so long as you sit on ours."

"Yes, that would be ideal, wouldn't it," I laugh, feeling more angry with each passing problem. "The only problem is that those two armies will probably fight until one of them is annihilated. One of them will sit on that throne and I could easily continue ignoring them. The only problem is that Daenerys Targaryen has three dragons and half of Westeros behind her. If she destroys the Lannisters, what is going to stop her from coming for us? We can fight, aye. We will probably have to but you know as well as I do that we can't win another bloody war, Jon. We haven't even won this one. We simply withdrew our armies and fortified our borders."

"She will want you to swear fealty to her," Jon speaks up and I say nothing. I can't. I don't know what she'll want or how I'll respond. At this point, it is a guessing game. She might believe we could put up a better fight and decide to ignore us, just as Cersei Lannister is doing. "If she wants to rule, she wants to rule all Seven Kingdoms. She is going to want North on her side as well."

"Possibly," I agree, looking down at my desk. "And if she comes to Winterfell's gates, I can either bend the knee or sign all of our death sentences."

"And you do not want that."

"Do you?" I ask in disbelief.

"No, but half of your man would rather die than fight for a Targaryen," he points out.

"Half of my men might not have a choice," I remind him. I know it all too well, how half of them would want me dead if I was even to consider joining a Targaryen, let alone proposing such a thing to them. But if she does threaten us, I would choose fealty over death, if that's what it came to. There has already been too much death, and I will not see more Northerners die just because of my lords' pride. "I don't want to think about it before the time is right but we are weeks, if not days away from her reaching Westeros. I can't say if she will attack first or if she will try to find more allies, but if the calculations are correct, she has enough men to crush the rest of Westeros in a heartbeat."

"Would she truly do that?" Jon asks. He must notice the look of confusion on my face because he sighs as he sits down on the other side of my desk. "She wants to be a Queen. I don't know her, don't know that much about her, but if so many people are willing to stand behind her and support her, die for her even, she must have sense in her head. She'll think before she makes a move. If she killed almost everyone, she'd only have ashes and people whom hate her to rule over. She might fight the Lannisters but she will not burn the whole realm to the ground."

"And we have declared ourselves as no longer being a part of that realm," I remind my brother, trying to ignore the feeling that it was a horrible mistake. "If we do not swear her fealty, would she truly have trouble with burning it to the ground? Her ancestor wasn't a violent murderer either Jon. Aegon the Conqueror had sense in his head too, but he had no qualms with burning those who didn't bend the knee. "

"Do you want that?" Jon asks, looking more worried than before. "Do you want us to be ruled by someone other than a Stark? Would you truly accept being called the second king who knelt?" he asks me.

How do I answer that? Is there any right answer? Nothing ever is as simple as right and wrong anymore. There's nothing I can do to keep my crown that will not involve the deaths of more Northerners. Whatever I decide, we will lose something. It will either be our freedom or our lives. If this had happened less than a year ago, I wouldn't even blink an eye. I would have refused any possible offer and I would have fought to my death, taking those that still supported me into their graves as well. Everything is different now. I think in a different way, I have to be more responsible than I was before. Too many have died in my name and at my command. I don't want people to die anymore.

"I don't want that, I truly don't," I admit, not even bothering to hide my defeat from Jon. "But I don't think we will have a choice. Not if we want to live. Not if we want our people alive, if we want all out wives and all our sons to live, if we want to have something to look forward to and not turn into dust."

"If that is the case, and that raven reaches us… say what you said to me. Tell your men the same words you have just told me. Perhaps then, they will see it the same way you do."

"And do you see it the same way?"

"My opinion doesn't matter much but aye, I do," he tells me. "We have lost so much Robb. Too many have died. It's better to sacrifice your pride and live under a sane dragon's rule, than sacrifice lives and die free.

"Aye," I nod my head and before I can continue speaking, a knock on the door interrupts me. "Come in."

Mother walks in, smiling at me before offering a tight smile to Jon. The two still do not get along well, not by any means, but at least she no longer openly shuns and shames him. He will soon be a Stark and finally, after years of resenting him, Mother had accepted that.

Father's death has changed us all. All of the deaths have changed us. We know better how trivial so many things really are and how the only thing that truly matters is family.

"I am sorry to interrupt, but someone wanted to see you," she tells me, smiling when I grin. I walk over to her and accept Ned into my arms. "He looks more like you with each passing day."

"Does he?" I ask, smiling down at him. "I see more of Talisa whenever I look at him."


	10. Chapter 10

**Here we go guys! I was planning to post this a bit later in the week, but it's my birthday and I wanted to give you a present, even if that's not how birthdays normally work :D**

 **Anyways, I hope you like it! The story is picking up speed and I am writing all the time, so I should update soon. I'm splitting time between this one and about 6 other stories AT THE SAME TIME and I need to work with my beta (the amazing darkwolf76 3) so I update whenever I can.**

 **All in all, thank you for your continuous support! It means so freaking much to me! Thank you for every follow, favorite and more than anything else, review. If you're up to it, check out my other stories. A lot of Robb and Jon :) Your kind words always keep me going so thank you! And now, let's see what's going on with Talisa and THAT plot twist! Let me know what you think! Enjoy! :)**

* * *

I rub my forehead as I try to get through another letter. No one ever tells how much paperwork ruling involves. It feels endless. I glance over my shoulder when I hear the chamber door open. My mother knocks quietly as she steps into the room and then closes the door behind her.

"Is everything alright with Ned?"

Whenever I see Mother approaching me, that is the first thought that crosses my mind. She takes care of him herself, most of the time. I try to spend time with him as much as I can but being a King, I cannot afford to spend my entire day locked up in a room with him. Not that I would complain about it.

He is growing up so fast. It seems to me that each day, he is a little bit bigger than he was the day before. Soon enough, he will be crawling, and not long after that, walking and talking. I will do everything in my power to be there when he does. I owe it to him and to his mother.

"He is asleep," she reassures me with a small smile, as she always does. I imagine all parents act in such a way because they understand the worry. I imagine she worried just as much about me. "I was wondering if I could speak to you. Do you have a moment?"

"Mother, of course I do," I chuckle, pushing away all the letters I had to read; they can wait. "Take a seat. What is bothering you?" I ask as she sits down opposite me.

"I have spent days trying to find the right words to say," she smiles hesitantly, as if she is laughing at a joke only she knows. "I don't know if there is a good way to say this to you, but you must hear it. The time has come and I have stayed silent long enough."

"Mother, you're starting to scare me." My gut twists in nervousness.

"It has been months, Robb," she tells me. It takes me a moment to realize what exactly she is talking about and the very second I realize it, I know why she was speaking so carefully; she knows I do not wish to hear of it. "Ned is growing more each day. And you… you are lonely, Robb."

"There is a difference between being alone and feeling lonely, Mother."

"Do not tell me that," she shakes her head. "Do not try to justify your actions by claiming that you are alright. You may be a king, but you are also my son, and I know you better in some ways than you know yourself. And I know that you are not alright."

"I am not trying to justify anything," I grumble, trying to control the anger that is growing in me. I have to remind myself that she is my mother and that despite what I might feel at the moment, she only has my best interest at heart. She must believe that she is doing the right thing, even if that isn't true. "I know what you want me to do. And that is quite alright, I thank you for your council. But as a King and more than that, as a man grown, I will do what I think best."

"Robb, you are young," she tries to reason with me, like that time before, some three months ago. We fought for hours then and did not speak to each other for an entire week after. I do not want to do that with her again, but she is not going to sway me. "You are a young man, handsome, considerate, and smart. Kind and honorable. You are a King. Young women would claw their eyes out for a chance to be your bride! You could choose any maiden you wanted."

"Mother, we have discussed this," I remind her. "I will not marry."

"You need to marry."

"I already have an heir."

"Yes, a babe that doesn't have a mother," she tells me. I know she speaks truth, but I can barely handle hearing it. It's too painful, but as King, I can't even show that pain. I see guilt on her face, but still, she refuses to let it go. "I know you loved Talisa with all your heart. She was your wife, your Queen. She loved you as well, and together, you created the most beautiful child. But Talisa is gone, Robb. She is gone… but you are still alive. You still have an entire life to live, one that could be filled with love, joy, and memories, despite how dark it might seem to you now. I understand what you are feeling. When we lost your father, I didn't know how I would go on. But I did," she looks away from me, tears filling her eyes. "Because I had you. I had you and your sister. Now, I have my grandchild as well. No matter how dark it gets, there are always more reason we must life for, Robb. Truly live for."

"And to me, that reason is my son," I tell her in a firm voice. There is nothing left to discuss. "I am alright mother, and I whatever I might feel about my wife's death, I will never let it affect my son, my family or my kingdom."

"But it already is affecting your son," she leans over the table and grabs ahold my hand. "He needs a mother, Robb. I am his grandmother. I can only do so much. Not to mention, your lords expect you to remarry in order to have more heirs. They'll insist on it for the stability of the kingdom.

"I can't bring Talisa back to life, can I?" I snap. "I don't care what the lords say. I will not get remarried just to make sure I have more children. My son is good enough."

"Robb, you are a King. If she has a chance to be a Queen, a woman would gladly accept your firstborn."

"Absolutely not," I tell her at once. "I am not going to force a woman into a marriage where she knows her husband doesn't want her and she has to raise a child that isn't hers. Nor will I put my son through that. Even if that means that he will not ever feel a mother's love."

"It might not be as difficult as you imagine it to be. It-"

"Really?" I interrupt her, losing the little control I had over the words I was choosing. "You think another woman would accept Ned as her son? Like you did with Jon?"

A mixture of anger and hurt flashes on her face before she manages to hide it.

"That is a different situation entirely," she replies in a strict tone. "Your Father had been married to me when he sired the boy. He broke his vow to me and he bedded another woman. Your son is trueborn. You wouldn't have broken any vows."

"It isn't as different as it might seem to you," I shake my head, angry at her justification. "Jon was a baby. You could not accept him, you could never even look at him. I do not know of a better mother than you and you could not do it. Only now, 20 years later, have you managed to rise above it. Even if I was to fall madly in love again, and could find a good, kind woman, willing to accept it all and give me more children, she would still be reminded that there was another woman I loved before her, every time she would look at Ned. She would always doubt me, always wonder, always treat Ned differently than her own children, even if she could treat him kindly. He would always know he was different. You loved Father with all your heart and still, you could never treat Jon as your own. His father had a wife, and he still never knew a mother's love. Even worse, he had to watch you give it freely to all of us, while you denied it to him. My son will already feel the pain of never knowing his own mother. I won't let him feel that pain too."

I am not surprised when she stands up and marches out of the room, without saying anything else to me and slamming the door behind her.

She may not want to hear it, but if she insists on telling me harsh truths, I must tell her the truth as well. She had made a decision a long time ago and despite having numerous opportunities to change it, she did not. Now, she has to live with it. And that means I can use it as a perfect reason for refusing her advice.

I will not do that to my son. I know letting him grow up without a mother might seem cruel, but he has a living grandmother and aunt to help me raise him. It might not be the same as having a mother, but it is far better than having a stepmother who despises him. I do not want to see that and I doubt that any woman would be capable to love him as a mother, even if she got a crown as reward.

And I am selfish. I do not want to move on. I do not want to marry again. I still love Talisa more than I have ever loved anyone in this entire world. I can only love our son as much as I love her. I know I could never love another the way I have loved her. I loved her with all my heart, never doubting it for a moment. I broke promises and pacts, risked my entire kingdom for that love, and never doubted or regretted it for a moment. I will never feel that again, nor do I want to try.

I already have an heir, no one can use that against me. I have no obligation to marry again. My son will inherit me and when I die, I will be buried next to his mother. My place is with Talisa, not some other woman. The gods might have taken her from me, but we will be together again one day. One day, perhaps not too far from today. But first, I need to raise our son to be the man she hoped he would be.

* * *

I thought Meereen was bad.

Dragonstone is far worse.

The biggest difference, right after the complete climate change we had to endure, is that it is empty. It was completely empty when we arrived on its shore. I feel grateful that we did not have to face an enemy right as we landed, but still...

Even with all the soldiers Dany had brought with her, the echoing halls seem empty. The castle has a dark and eerie feeling to it, as if it is still haunted by the dead Baratheon pretender that has dwelt here before. I did not like Meereen, especially not when compared to Pentos, but Dragonstone is something entirely different. Meereen had light. The Pyramid was full of it. It might have appeared menacing from the outside, but inside, it was just like another mansion, one with a magnificent view.

Dragonstone is dark and unwelcoming to everyone but to dragons.

Dany did not look uncomfortable, not once. With all the dragon carvings on the walls of the castle, I can understand why she seems to like the castle. It was empty and unoccupied, with a thick layer of dust covering every surface and strange banners hanging from its walls, yet Dany had come into the world here. Her ancestors had built this place and countless generations of her family had dwelt here, so she belongs.

She had the keep cleaned and hung Targaryen banners in place of the pretenders, so it feels a little less off-putting, but is still as unwelcoming as it was before.

At least the dragons seem to be enjoying all the space they have been given. I imagine that the two that were locked up in the Pyramid are enjoying it even more than Drogon, who has never been shackled. Back in Meereen, their presence would scare the folk, sometimes even cause trouble. Here, on Dragonstone, they had no one to bother. Those of us here got used to them a very long time ago.

"How long do you think it will take Cersei to receive news of our arrival?" Dany asks.

"I imagine that she is already well aware of that, your Grace," Tyrion tells her, not looking elated at the thought of his sister. "If not, she will find out in a matter of hours. By tomorrow morning, at the latest."

"Will she be sending an army our way or will she wait for us to make a move on the main land?" she asks.

"I cannot say for certain, your Grace," he admits. This could be an issue, given that he is the only one here that actually knows how a Lannister thinks like. However, he is not a mind reader. If Cersei is aware of his allegiance to Dany, and I do not doubt that she is, she might change her entire plan. If she believes that Tyrion is guessing her next move, she will do what Tyrion least expects her to. And Tyrion Lannister seems to be well aware of that. "The Cersei Lannister I know would wait. She would wait to hear from you, to hear what you want. If she is faced with silence, she will attack first. However, attacking first might also bring wrath of the people to her door. The one who strikes first and starts another war might very well end up a victor but they will be hated by the common folk."

"So, you are trying to say that you have absolutely no idea what she might do?"

If I wasn't concerned about the whole situation, I might have laughed so hard, that I cried. The look of skepticism on Dany's face can only be matched with the look of utter defeat on Tyrion's; he had tried so hard to make her see the positive sides of the entire situation, on masking it all up for her and she had called his bluff within seconds. However, I am not laughing because we needed Tyrion to do one of the things he does best, know people.

"Not yet," he sighs, admitting his defeat. "At this point, it is a guessing game. I am certain that she will not attack at once. Even if she wishes to try and fool us, she is still very calculating. She will not start a war with you, not until she knows the exact number of men, horses and ships you have in your arsenal."

"Then we need to make sure that it takes her a while to discover," Dany tells him with a small smile; oh, it is one of those smiles. One of those that tells you she is up to no good. She would have that smile whenever she was about to present a mischievous plan, a plan that would have been the end of us, had we been caught while putting it into action. It is a good thing we were never caught. "We will send no word. We will not announce anything. We will not ask her to swear fealty and bend the knee. We will wait and we will enjoy as the uncertainty eats her up."

"Dany, do not play with your food if you plan to eat it," I sigh, feeling the need to advise her against this. While I completely understand her perspective, I need to think like a responsible and mature adult that I am; this is war, not a childish game. "Cersei Lannister does not strike me as a particularly patient woman. She seems like someone who does not enjoy being provoked and who responds to it in the same, if not worse, manner. Playing games with her will not make this any easier for us," I tell her. "Your Grace." I add as I realize that this is considered to be an official council, even if only the three of us are present.

"How is it provoking if I do absolutely nothing?" she asks.

"Well, normally, it would not be considered provoking," I concede, "However, you are well aware that Cersei Lannister will see it for what it truly is and I am afraid she would not take it lightly."

"We will fight sooner or later, Milani," she tells me. Once again, she has a point. "It cannot be avoided. Westeros cannot have two Queens. We will go to war, whether that happens tomorrow or in a year. And when we do, I believe it would be better if we fight on our land, on our territory."

"You wish to bring the fight to Dragonstone?" Tyrion asks in confusion. I imagine that the look on my face is completely mirroring his own, that of bewilderment.

"Not necessarily," she comments. Why is she speaking in riddles?! She should speak plainly with us, her hand and her closest friend! If there is anyone in this world that she should have complete trust in… yet, we are sitting right in front of her, growing more and more confused with each word that comes out of her mouth. "I want Cersei to think that I want to bring the fight to Dragonstone."

"Now I'm even more confused," I admit, not bothering to hide my bewilderment. "You want her to think that but what are you planning to do instead? What exactly do you expect her to do then?" I wonder.

"Absolutely nothing," Dany smiles at me. Once again, that mischievous smile of hers makes an appearance. The difference is, back when we were young girls, the only trouble we could end up in was a scolding by the master whose house we were staying at. Now, the trouble could end up being losing an entire war, and the deaths of thousands, despite all the forces that are on our side. It's one thing to play childish games when you are a proper child and another to play them as a Queen, responsible for the lives of countless people. "If she thinks I wish to lure her out, that is the last thing she will do. She will not attack, not if she thinks that is a trap. And her not attacking could give us time. Valuable time."

Now that I see it, now that she said it openly, I understand. And I realize just how brilliant the idea is.

She could beat Cersei at her own game. If Cersei wishes to make us confused as to what she is going to do next… well, Dany has already started playing that game. She started playing that game a long time ago, before she even knew of it. The game started the first time Cersei Lannister heard of a possible danger across the Narrow Sea. Now, as she makes her first move, Dany already knows how to play. Possibly even better than Cersei Lannister does.

She is brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.

"Valuable time for what?" Tyrion asks and just like that, the elated feeling, caused by the brilliance of her plan, leaves me. Someone had to ask the difficult questions. "What do you need time for? The army we have is not going to get any bigger."

"Why couldn't it?" Dany asks. While I am rooting for her in this little mind game she and Tyrion are playing, I do not understand what she means; I am seeing it through Tyrion's eyes. Confusing Cersei is a brilliant move but why do we need time when we already have the upper hand? "Cersei isn't the only one that who wears a crown in Westeros," she tells us. "The North and the Riverlands have declared themselves a separate Kingdom, ruled by Robb Stark. There might not be anything I could do to get Cersei to surrender but the North and its King are a different story. I have plenty to offer him."

"Dany, what are you trying to say?" I ask.

Why am I asking when I already know the answer? It was one of the options, right from the start. It had never left her mind and while it is the logical decision, I am afraid she is far to certain that there is no way her little plan could backfire. And I am afraid that it could.

"I'm going to offer myself to Robb Stark," she announces, confirming my suspicions. "If he marries me, we shall once again unite Westeros and he will remain a King. And together, both his forces and mine, could swipe Cersei and her army off the face of the earth."

"That goes without saying but… Dany, what if he refuses?" I speak my doubts.

"Why would he refuse?" she asks.

Truly, why would he? She is well loved and respected among her people. She has freed cities and punished slavers. She has three dragons. She brought Dothraki screamers across the sea, willing and ready to fight for her, die if they must. She gave the Unsullied their freedom and they chose to fight for her. Her name alone inspires admiration.

Not to mention that she has to be the most beautiful woman in and outside of Westeros.

He would get her for a wife, get her for a Queen and would still keep a crown on his head. Robb Stark would be fool, not intelligent enough to rule if he refused such an offer.

Dany is right, he will not refuse her. Now that I realize that, I am only left to worry about what that will mean for Dany and if she is truly aware of what she might be getting herself into.

It is a good thing I do not have problems of my own. If I had, my head would probably explode.

* * *

Why is her hair so beautiful? It's unfair. I know exactly what she does to it and I do exactly the same; I rinse it two times, just as she does. I use the same mixture of herbs that she uses. And it doesn't work.

Ugh, I am becoming a jealous mess and all because of hair?! Have I truly become that petty?

"Dany, I know we have had this conversation before, numerous times actually but I just… I can't help it. I worry that you have no idea what you might be getting yourself into."

"You are right," she agrees, tilting her head backwards so that I don't have to lean over to comb her hair. "We have been through this numerous times." She adds. I can almost hear the sound of my hopes crashing down.

"Oh, I forgot how funny and charming you can be," I sound bitter and that only makes her laugh a bit more. "You can play it off, act as if it is nothing more than a joke but I will keep bringing it up, I can promise you that," I warn her. Out of everyone, she should be the one who knows just how stubborn I can become if I truly put my mind to something. "I don't think you are aware of what this marriage would mean. A union with a man you do not know. A complete stranger, to share your bed and your crown. You haven't even laid eyes on him yet!"

"From what I've heard, he is a handsome man," she comments and at that, I drop my task and walk around her to face her, to try and see if she is just messing with me or being serious. And by the looks of her, I'm afraid she is being serious.

"Dany, please listen," I sigh. She can act all foolish as much as she wants. I do not care who finds her believable because I don't. "It's not about the looks and you know it. He could be the handsomest man in the world but if his head is empty, or even worse, filled with something cruel, you will be caught in a very bad situation. Looks are what matters the least; what if he is some brutish savage that tried to harm you, or mindless dolt that cost you your throne?"

"Do you truly believe he would have been made a King if he was all of those things?"

"In all honesty, I wouldn't be surprised," I admit, feeling annoyed at her look of confusion. "These people love to have rulers, and follow them blindly. In this world, you get something just because your father had it before you. Their last King was a child. The one before him was a sadistic child and the one before him was a drunken usurper. And they all followed them without thinking twice about it. Robb Stark might very well be the best King there ever was but he is a King simply because his Father was Warden of North. If a half-wit cow was Lord Stark's firstborn, he would be King. No one is chosen because of their capability but because of their bloodline."

"Half-wit cow?"

"Oh, you know what I mean!" I snap in annoyance. Of all the words, she chooses to hold onto those?! "Dany, what I am trying to say is that you do not know him and should use caution before you offer yourself up in marriage to him. I am just a simple woman. My marriage can be arranged, I can marry whomever because I have nothing to lose. My possible marriage pact will not be the thing that might make an entire Kingdom fall! You are a Queen. If you have a horrible marriage, you will lose all that you hold dear, all that you have spent years trying to acquire. You need to think. You can't marry a stranger. You need to marry the one that is the best for you, not because of his army but because of his character."

"Milani, you tend to forget that I already have survived one arranged marriage to a stranger."

"Yes, and it was Viserys who pushed you into it, but thankfully it worked out. Are you truly willing to take that risk again though, when you have so much more to lose? Is this something that you want for yourself, after everything you have been through? You have spent years fighting for your crown, years trying to get to where you should have been from the start. Are you willing to risk all of it just because someone has a few soldiers to offer?"

It looks as if my words have finally reached her. It is not a perfect idea. If it did work, it would make our path easier. If they were well suited and found a way to connect, it would be… amazing. But if they do not fit, if they clash, it could be the end of everything. The end of Daenerys Targaryen, her dynasty, and everything she had tried to build.

"Just to make myself clear, I am not saying that you shouldn't marry him," I elaborate, watching as she frowns in confusion. "It could work. And if it works, it will be perfect. But it might not work. What I am suggesting is for you to wait. Don't offer yourself straight away. If you are going to invite him here, do not offer marriage the moment he steps foot through the gates. Wait a little. See who you are dealing with. Watch the way he thinks, the way he rules. The man you marry will be your companion for the rest of your life. He will be in charge of Westeros, just as much as you. It's not a decision that should be rushed into. It can't be taken lightly. Find out whom he is first. See if he has a good head on his shoulders, possibly a kind heart. If he ends of being all that your future partner should be, by all means, marry him. I will be the happiest person at your wedding feast, drinking and dancing until my feet bleed. If he is for ruler and good match for you, marry him. If he is not… find another. You deserve the best. And if you yourself do not care if you get the best, than think of what your Kingdom deserves. Because they deserve the best as well."

People have the tendency to offer the best advice to others, all the while making horrible decisions for themselves. I tend to do that. I always do that and now, I recognize that Dany does it as well. She can calm me down, no matter the problem. She can council me and choose her words carefully, so that I see where exactly I went wrong. But when I am alone, when I am expected to make decisions on my own, I turn into a fool that doesn't have my own best interest at heart.

It's the same with her. She can help anyone. She can have a meaningful conversation with anyone, whether it is a King, Lord or a servant. The advice I have gotten from her has to be the best advice I have ever gotten. But when it comes to her own decisions, for herself, and not her kingdom, she can be an utter disaster.

And that's why I'm here. I need to point it out and shake some sense into her. I'm here to look out for Dany the woman, as much as Daenerys the Queen.

"You are right," she sighs, finally admitting defeat. I feel intense relief that she won't be making a rushed decision. "He will be invited here and once we see who we are dealing with, I will decide whether or not he would be a good match. The only problem is that we truly need him to be a good match. At the moment, he is our best possibility. Our best possible alliance. No one else has such an army. It's only him or Cersei Lannister and I doubt Cersei has a particular desire to marry me."

"We are talking about a woman that shares three children with her brother, right?" I mumble, trying to bring a light into our conversation. It works; both of us try to laugh. "I understand that he is your best option. But all we can do know is hope that for one, he is willing to accept and also, that he is worthy of sharing your throne. And if he is not… perhaps you can acquire some of his support if you throw me his way and convince him to bend the knee. He won't be a King and he will not be your husband but at least he could keep his rule of the North and have your support."

"You have just reminded me that arranged marriages are the worst thing about this culture and now you are willing to sacrifice yourself to one if he's too horrible for me?"

"I have always been ready," I shrug my shoulders. "As I also said before, my marriage would not potentially end the kingdom if it did not go well. I am the only one that would have to suffer through it and if it will help you secure your place as the rightful ruler of this land, I am more than willing. No matter what, no matter how uncomfortable, awkward or horrible my marriage might end up being, it cannot possibly be worse than the life I would have led had I not met you."

I could marry a brute. I could marry a drunk. I could marry a fool, with not a lot of sense in his head. If I do, it will be one brute, one drunk, one fool. Even combined, it would just be one person. One person I would have to tolerate and live with for the rest of my life. It would not be idyllic, not in any way. But at least I would not have hundreds of men abusing me, using me and humiliating me for a small amount of coin. Knowing the life I could have had, I would be more than willing to endure any kind of marriage for the friend that saved me.


End file.
